this isn't really a "poem". it's more like a diary exert or something. i was too angry to give it any rhythm or rhyme scheme. i think emotion is good enough, at least for the time being.
i am supposed to love you, but all you do is rip me apart! you make me feel so special, and then you seem to forget i am alive. and it hurts that i still see you. i still have to pretend. i have to make believe that everything is and always will be okay between us. i suppose it doesn't matter that you abandoned me. that you left me behind right when i needed you. how could i not hold that against you!?!?! i loved you so much, i looked up to you, and you left me! so why do you look so fucking puzzled when i don't absorb every second of time i have with you!
can you not even imagine how you hurt me?! you don't have a clue! god, i wish i could escape from you. i am tired of your hurt and your pain and you pretending everything is okay. i'm tired of you! you make me sick! god, i wish you cared about me. i wish you loved me. i never meant to do anything to you. i never meant to be favored. i'm so sorry. i couldn't control it. i wish i could change the past, maybe then you wouldn't hold so much against me. i'm so sorry. so fucking sorry. please forgive me. i want you to be happy. i'm sorry. sorry. |
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