The little girl hugged her knees to her chest sobbing. Her little tiny nails were chipped with bright pink polish, a constant reminder of her grandma, before she got mad. Before her daddy came home.
She wanted to ride her old red tricycle.
She covered her ears tightly with her cold hands, her earring's pressed into her soft flesh behind her ears drawing small drops of blood that dripped onto her mismatched Disney pajamas.
"You're good for nothin alcholic." Her grandma's shrill voice screamed, "You knocked up a hoar and now I'm stuck with that fucking kid of yours! You're in jail half tyhe time and you don't work, I'm gonna put her out on the street, do you hear me?"
She wanted to put the green dress on her favourite Barbie.
The little girl with light blond hair felt the tears slide downm her cheeks. Her chest hurt, as if a weight was on it, she started to cry. ::Don't cry, Grandma will get ad. Daddy will hit you. Don't cry:: She clamped her pearly teeth down on her hand to silence herself.
The screaming got louder, there was banging, her grandma was crying, screaming. Her dady was cursing, she crawled under the bed parying they wouldn't find her. Ever. She closed her eyes tightly, willing herself to be invisable.
She wanted to swim in her little plastic pool.
Her sock had fallen off, she could see it, three fett away from the bed. She was cold, the wooden floor hurt her belly, she considered grabbing her sock. It seemed quieter now. her grandma wasn't crying anymore. She slowly edged herself to the edge of the bed and reached out a small shaking hands to the purple sock. BOOM - the door slammed open and she froze.
"What the fuck?" It was her dady, "i told you to go to sleep. I'm your FATHER." His words were loud. She started shaking. He grabbed her hand and pulled he rout. Hard. Her head hit the metal bed frame, she saw little stars.
She wanted to watch Bambi.
He dropped her and she crumpled on the floor, sobs shaking her little belly. Brusises covered bruises and her thumb found her mouth in the long silcne that came before he began to hit her. ::Grandma, Grandma!:: She cried silenty. ::Grandma will come, Grandma always comes::
She wanted her play-doh, to watch it melt on the blacktop outside the apartment.
Grandma didn't come. And daddy forced himself on her. And her body shook, and she cried. And she cries to this day, every night she cries. Her Grandma never woke up. Her daddy went to prison for killing her Grandma.
And all she wanted was a mommy.
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