A Ballad: "Passage of the Imaginary"
So I was told,
As I walked alone
With an imaginary friend,
That at the end of this
Tunnel was a dyad of
Blooming glory,
Just like spring.
And in this sad creation,
The one I walk in,
Hope was the only machination
Keeping my heart beat beating.
Baby steps, maybe on your knees,
It said, were the only solution.
Without them we lose ourselves
And pretend we are what we
Wish to be. We all must share
The same reality to be relieved.
Maybe it was my eyes,
But at the end of my tunnel vision,
I saw a light. Perhaps
I was lying or maybe
I was believing.
Believing in someone
For something I just
Felt for the first time.
My boy, that's the heaven
You could reach. That's
Your curiousity, that's
Your boyhood TV, that's
The knight in shining
Roller skates, singing
Of causes lost to
Perversion and insincerity,
Selfishness and impurity.
That's Love, dear boy and
She's calling you.
All this grimey water
Was up to my knees,
Carrying me back to resentful
Memories. All the mistakes
And the black waste in a tide
Pushing against my stride,
Pushing me back and inviting me.
Inivitations of violation
Or complete domination,
The chance to be something I'm not.
I can't look back, so I don't.
I want Love, and I want hope.
I want to touch the sword once
More and dream of waking up
To the smells of easy sleep.
But I fell into it.
I fell in without any
Thought. Covered in the mud,
And preaching like Christ,
My mouth opened and all
Which poured forth was
Of trash. My friend sat,
Astonished, but taking a
Back seat. He observed
And let my hostility
Be my lesson, the bruises
That would turn to scratches
Would scar my face.
I was lost in a cavern
Of grime and smelling
Pollution, I was lost
In a well, using my hands
To feel around the slime
Covered stones.
I was asleep for so long.
I came to only for a voice.
A voice, music, was speaking
To me. A reminder of my
Friend, where had he gone?
He must have left me. So little
Hope for me, lost in this well
Without a flashlight. Blindfolded
And spewing forth blackened blood,
A mouthful of descending and
Distasteful, dissolute debauchery.
Base as I was, even with the semen
On my hands, I heard Love. I heard
Her once again and I circuited
Blindly, around and around again.
She held my hand. Her arms reached
Into the mud and pulled me up.
I had been lost in a maze,
A labyrinth of lies.
There he was, with her all along,
My imaginary friend. He had come
Along, outside, speaking his words
Of wisdom, wiser than ever before.
I looked down at the nonsense,
Swirling in a pile of steaming
Vomit, a smell like piss, something
Like a death pit, full of the words
And thoughts I had.
He told me, my friend,
To build a lid, to seal
Off this desecration,
To make this seal for Love.
So I manufactured a seal,
A veil of string and hands,
A blanket whose secret strength
Lies in wax and pain.
I wanted to see in the hole,
So it couldn't all happen again.
In completion I fabricated
A lock of wires and singing
Towers composed of resonant
Melody, of hope and of stability.
Designed to sing of sweet Love,
To sing in lamentation her absence,
And reminding me of the coming
Revolutions, reminding me
Of Hope. For she was
of both, Love and Hope.
The same woman, housing
Honesty and Comfort
In the house of her arms.
And with that said,
I parted ways with
My old friend. He simply
Smiled and told me I needed
Not luck to consummate my affection
But the will and he soul.
With that he simply
Looked into my mirror and
Disappeared, a relic
Of school-boy joy.
And then I knew who
I was and what I knew.
I'm sticking my nose in a book.
I'm taking the hand of true friends
With movie-like minds, with the power
Of the fictional, the propelling.
I'm sticking myself in games
To play with her hair. I'm dreaming
Again and my sorrows lift
From seemingly impossible odds
Unto the clouds above the dust.
And the fire cools inside.
So we warm ourselves, Love and I,
Beneath blankets of reason
And understanding. A blanket
Of months and days, a blanket
Of comprehension. But we
Just can't sit still.
So we spin a weave,
A shield made of fleece,
Of sacrifice and remembering
Mistakes.
We can't just sit still,
So we manifest a canopy
To sit out in the rain
And watch the leaves.
The water rolls down them
Like waterfalls over
Great cliffs. The trees
Are made of crystal sheets,
Surrounded by the aura of
A rainbow puncuated by a
Burning sun. Love and I
Smile at the eachother,
And relax our muscles
Upon the dew soaked grass,
We unload the weight from
Our backs and we love.
My feet have carried me
Only so far. But I have
Been given the chance
To dream. I have the will
And the soul, I have
A dream. We will build
A monument to faith,
To dedication and to thought.
Love and I will succeed.
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