my body is an empty shell
I watch my every move
with removed distance.
From some safe,
more innocent place.
Watch my actions
without thought
Robotic
Press a button
I am all yours
Convenient
I cringe at being in my body at
thinking of tomorrow
at sitting here
on my bed
where only hours ago…
I long for childhood
for unsurgical restoration
of innocence
I long for things
I cannot have
I waste my thoughts
on impossibilities.
The used angry girl
has become the lost
little searching child
…always searching
never crying
never finding
smile, and keep looking child
and pray that hope is still in the box.
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