Water mixes with salt
Rain pours down my face
Combining tears with water
My face is uplifted, searching the heavens
My hands raised; reaching out
Longing to hold on, never to let go
Searching the darkness for the warmth they’ve held
My hands find nothing
They fall defeated back to my sides
My body aches to feel you again
My mind drifts back to that last night together
I am there again
No stopping, can’t turn back
I cling to you, knowing I have to let go
Memorizing everything about you
Your smell, how you feel beneath my fingertips
What you look like;
I raise my head from your shoulder and look to you
Your face silhouetted against the stars
Staring ahead; you look determined
I know it’s a bluff, you are crumbling inside
Just like me
A wall that has stood the pounding for too long
It breaks, cracks, tumbles, revealing its contents
Spilling them forth unchecked
No hesitation, this is the last time after all
Clinging, breaking
Falling, crashing
Northern lights dance above us, do you see?
How beautiful, like you
They cavort above us always changing
I can never quite decide whether they are more
Beautiful or sad
The gentle motion of the car lurches and stops
One last desperate hug
One last kiss
Tears and hearts combine
We part, tearing, ripping
And pretend a casual goodbye
Now as I stand in the downpour
I remember, and think
I am grateful for those last moments together
You’ve been gone forever in my heart
I will never see you again
Not the carefree laughing boy of my memories
I am scared of what I will see in his place
Of what this will change you into
I open my eyes and notice that the rain has stopped
Distant thunder rumbles
Giving vent to someone else’s agony and rage
Water drips of the trees
The drops slowly forming then plummeting
I find myself walking through a meadow
Filled to the brim with daisies
This should fill me with peace, joy, smiles
It doesn’t
Then with the trees I cry too
My tears also forming slowly, painfully
Then rocketing earthward
To die without a sound
A single death wish
With no one to remember them and mourn
I remember
I mourn
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