i don't really hate u people
but i don't like u either
i've got it down...
i'm completely indifferent no matter what happens to me
good or bad?
i don't care
take women...
i don't care about women getting naked and showing themselves to the world... but then i don't care when they expect me to believe that there is something else beneath the flesh and blood...
take wars...
i don't care about violence too much... i've never been in a fight but then i've never had anything to stand for
there's equality but i'm not a minority
there's fraternity but i obviously don't have a friend
there's liberty but i'm not anyones son there of
so here i stand with my hands in my pants staring into the face of great adversity knowing all that is my fate in life will end inevitably in death... i embrace the emptiness and welcome the bliss that is my complete darkness
take hate...
hatred for jews?
i don't want money
hatred for blacks?
i don't want women
hatred for hispanics?
i don't want a job
i've abdicated my throne on this shallow earth for a frontrow seat on the electronic side show
i don't need reality, i've given up
i used to stare straight into the sun
but now
my eyes only grace the false light of a computer screen
racism?
i don't care about racism
i hate everyone equally
forgive everyone ; forget everyone
but aboveall, i hate myself
because i could never be as funny as stile
i could never be as good looking as aaron
never as charismatic as TR
never as intelligent as the guy in the wheelchair
i'm not a looker like the web babes
not a seducer?
not an enchantress?
not a swoon? not a boon?
only detriment to myself and society as a whole...
it is clear...
all i'm good for is ditch digging
i can handle ditch digging
grab a shovel and start shoveling
simplify, simplify like David used to chant
i can dig the hole
i can dig the sweat...
but where's the respect?
ok, i know asking for respect was a little too hasty for someone in my position...
but where's the dignity?
ok, a guy who spends his days shoveling shit surely doesn't deserve that simple pleasure...
but where's the stock options?
shoveling shit, like everything else on the dow is going down...try next quarter, ok?
but then, where's the retirement?
no?
fine, don't give me retirement...
i understand that those other people who worked hard for their education and earned their place in society deserve it far better than me...
so just tell me where's the gun to put the end to yet another wasted life?
oh, so now u want to take that right away too
-something about the kids being unhappy?
well, fuck...
vicious circle in motion
my hands are empty...
all that is left for me is humility and my social shunning
humility
ah, God's true glory is revealed
for therein lies the pure truth of the world
/me thinks a proof is coming
humility was always God's most prized virtue
the virtue that not even satan could bend too
for the devil was too dignified
humility?
the product of extreme toil without showing the desire of any material returns
-those damned diminishing returns
in exchange for the inheritance of spiritual growth
building character?
the mark of a true working man
a man who loves his life so much that he spends it producing ; not wasting away
a man who has done something that matters
a man who has given his all
someone i should respect and look to for answers
his words though not grand and articulate are the words of experience
his actions never challenged, his purpose always righteous
surely i can look upon these people in the chatrooms, forums and on the world wide web and maybe just maybe
gaze upon their grace and glory
the humility
like the first day that little abel, son of adam, brought forth the first basket of fruit to his wellknowledged teacher - like the applepolisher that he was
he gave the lord the choicest fruit of the land
he tilled the earth
he reaped what he sewed
the sweat of his toils
in essence
was
humility
meanwhile
cain brought forth the flesh of animals
animals
their consuming made them fat and rich with sweet taste
their toil made the flesh full of fibrous
meat
yes
cain did work hard for his master
but was it the thrill of the hunt that gave him pleasure?
the joy of carving the flesh of the lamb?
the burning of the sweet fat for incense?
the blood running from his lips?
perhaps the second son had alterior motives than just the simple serving of ones God
so
if u are such a hardworked man like you propose ; a wise man who knows the ways of the world...
such r.e.s.p.e.c.t. for you
that when you speak, i should remain quiet...
for to interrupt you is to deter the sharing of the wealth of important knowledge
a real man?
then u are filled with this humility
humbleness toward friend and foe alike
even to the egotistical bob
u are a great man!
a complete man!
your job is done
your life was well spent
your fruit is sustaining
your God is pleased
but
but
but you show no humility towards anyone
you deny God
you deny servitude
you deny man's brotherhood
to you
every man is his own king
every man is his own god
every man must prove his worth to you
or you will have none of it
you are right
you have none of it
no humility
no humbleness before anyone
hmmmmmmmm
therefore you did not work hard to achieve your social status
your prize and title are a falsehood
you live a lie
you, the betrayer, were born on the backs of greater men...
and your weight alone could crush their bones..
such a fragile existance the earth is
so many brothers paying the price day in and day out... and this work goes unheeded
they are giving all their lives to the world and to this God u don't believe in...
they are wasted
yet you prance around on their hardships
perhaps they are naive
perhaps they are fools
but goddamn you and your arrogance
the backs of the bruised?
God money is not one to choose?
doesn't ring a bell
click the next link for stiles sake
makes some dough
bake a cake and eat it too
-you feel that? that's the pride fucking with you...
enough about jobs
personally i don't care for em
tyler durden says you're not your job
and he's probably right
i can't work for anything i don't believe in
and i don't believe in anything
not you
not me
not stile
i'm pretty goddamn lazy and i'll get the next welfare check soon
but a change is a brewing
i can smell it
or maybe i just need to take a shower
dunno
the only thing i do know is this...
one of these days
when the time is right
and the moment comes
you are going to have to make a decision
one of these days
you are going to have to drop your cocks
and raise your hands |
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