What to do at Mcdonalds
1. Ask if they want fries with the money 2. Order an item from another place (i.e. the 8pc. original bucket) 3. Ask for extra meat 4. Order a Big Mac in a Crispy Chicken box (or something similar) 5. Order an apple pie box 6. Order a sundae without the container 7. Ask them to make sure the cow is dead this time 8. Ask for change for a penny; when they say they can't, ask if they really want your business or not 9. Say no when they ask if they can take your order 10. Ask if you can talk to Ronald 11. Repeat everything they say 12. When they repeat the order, say that's not right, then repeat it exactly as they did 13. Ask how much the sign outside cost 14. Tell them Ray Kroc is outside 15. If they say that he's dead, respond "Not anymore!" 16. Recite Hamlet's entire soliloquy, adding "cheeseburger" at various places 17. Specify the order is to go 18. Order a roll of toilet paper 19. Order a Big Mac without the Mac 20. Ask if they have Small Mac's because you're not very hungry 21. Question them as to how to say "French Fries" in Italian 22. Hand them your garbage sack, and ask if they can recycle it 23. Ask for 45 mints and 1 French Fry, no salt 24. Order a box of napkins 25. Ask what kind of ketchup they use, then order 40 of the little paper containers for it 26. Order a semicolon 27. Try to work the words "downloading" and "FTP" into the conversation 28. Tell them you came to "get a few" 29. Order a value meal one higher than what they have, or maybe just ... "Yeah, I'll take a #27, super-sized" (then ... "Well you had it YESTERDAY!) 30. Ask if they take American Express 31. Order the source code to a cheeseburger 32. Make modem-like noises 33. Ask for a Quarter Pounder.com with a large side order of fries.net 34. Refer to ordering as "uploading". 35. Ask if this is really McDonald's, or just another JFK cover-up 36. Say "Testing, testing 1 2 3 ..." 37. Drive in backwards 38. If the restaurant has two windows, ask where the third is 39. Say, "I'm sorry, I must have the wrong number." Then pull away normally. 40. Make sure they know that you want "pepperoni and extra cheese" on that 41. Recite your order in poem form 42. ... and begin it with "A poem - by Henry Gibson" 43. Use large words, such as "condiments" and "intermingled." For example, "Please do not intermingle the condiments on the quarter pound of beef that is going to be specially made for my possession." 44. Ask if its the party to whom you are speaking. 45. If they sound irritated or are laughing, tell them "please treat the order box with respect" 46. Ask for a cheeseburger with a view. 47. Repeat everything they say. 47.5 Repeat everything they say. 48. Ask if they can give you the fries without putting them through "that horrible torture of cooking." 49. Scream "Call 911!" and speed away variation: scream "Call 912!" and speed away 50. Say your favorite lines from movies. i.e., I canna do it Captain! She's gonna blow!, Show me the MONEY!, or Do ya feel lucky? Well, do ya punk?.... Fries? I don't need no stinking fries! 51. Read the entire contents of this list, preferrably in the HTML source code, and pronouncing words like "period" and "close quotation mark"
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