What is your meaning of life?, Page 2

Thread Topic: What is your meaning of life?

JCls Joined: Jul 6, '10 Status: New User	2010-07-10 21:06:37
	um, she kind of made the mistake, not u. y r u beatin urself up about it?
serinitiy69 Joined: Jul 10, '10 Status: New User	2010-07-10 21:07:43
	because im not sane i feel guilty for being born ok
JCls Joined: Jul 6, '10 Status: New User	2010-07-10 21:10:35
	sucks 4 u. if u can find find a way around that somehow, ull be a lot better off.us not much else i can say.
aca6 Joined: Dec 19, '09 Status: Senior User	2010-07-10 21:33:55
	I have to say chocolate. I don't think there is any chocolate in the afterlife, maybe that bread thing that I can't remember the name of but no chocolate. :P
elisafauzana Joined: Aug 27, '09 Status: Senior User	2010-07-10 22:13:48
	life is pretty much meaningless to me. the only thing that makes me keep going is my responsibilty to take care my husband and son. i can't imagine what will happen to me once they stop loving me. but again, why would they? i learned it a very hard way that it is just a stupid fear ofabandonment of a bpd. ok, then you might ask, then why life is meaningless when i have them. oh, yeah..that depression, the mental status, is pretty much uncontrolable. so i tell myself, count the blessing. and so i feel so much blessed, just minus the willing to be able to enjoy the life. all i want is just a mundane life with those boring routine of going to and back from work, cook, eat, spend some time with my family, sleep, and tomorrow starts a all new same old routine. i don't want party, i don't want to know people, i don't want to celebrate anything, i don't want to engage myself in conversations with collegue, don't want to get involved in any situation that will need my involvement, be it good or bad. i wish i could have been able to live my own. but the loneliness was killing me. so i have family. but i am not sure if i am contributing enough to make this happen. because, the depression, self denial, self defeating, self sabotaging is pretty much on my mind everyday. lack of energy most of the time. only soemtimes, out of no where(maybe 2-3 days in a month) i will feel i love this life i am living and i want to do my best to make this really happen. so it is not like depression all the time. it is like bipolar. up and down. not even sure if i answered yur Q, obsidian.
Obsidian Joined: Jan 22, '10 Status: Senior User	2010-07-10 22:20:22
	You did answer it, "the only thing that makes me keep going is my responsibilty to take care my husband and son". And that is a bigger reason than most have. You hate your daily routines and you are at the same time afraid of breaking out of it. That's troublesome. :P
aca6 Joined: Dec 19, '09 Status: Senior User	2010-07-10 22:29:34
	Since when did you become a shrink? :P At you're not sugar-coating it. :/
Obsidian Joined: Jan 22, '10 Status: Senior User	2010-07-10 22:33:14
	I only summed up what she said. :P What is sugar-coating?
aca6 Joined: Dec 19, '09 Status: Senior User	2010-07-10 22:36:21
	Isn't that technically a shrinks job? :P Sugar-coating is when you bend the truth. As in making something seem better than it actually is or discreetly lying to someone.
Obsidian Joined: Jan 22, '10 Status: Senior User	2010-07-10 22:39:33
	"Isn't that technically a shrinks job? :P" Good point. :P And she seems to have a lot, only incapable of seeing it at times. So no sugar-coating. :P
aca6 Joined: Dec 19, '09 Status: Senior User	2010-07-10 22:44:34
	I don't see why you need so many years of college to f--- with peoples minds and take their money. People on random forums do it just as well as the "experts." ^_^ She does but I can't say anything about them because I have never personally communicated with her so I would feel as if I was intruding if I said anything, even if it was sugar-coated. >__<
Obsidian Joined: Jan 22, '10 Status: Senior User	2010-07-10 22:58:45
	I've had discussions with her before, she isn't very active anymore though, because of her busy daily routine. :P
elisafauzana Joined: Aug 27, '09 Status: Senior User	2010-07-10 23:14:55
	you guys are already sweet, so i wont need anymore sugar to coat.:) i am not sure if i hate my routine. i used to hate my life before. i hated the job. i hated living and facing my narcisstic mother and her insults. but now i have pretty good life.i have kinda escaped from all the madness and trigger factors.all new good life in a all new country, all new job with less stress (just packing breads and checking. how stressful it can be? :P), all newly modified husband(shows his love and affection towards me more than before, more understanding, except sorta forcing me to have our second child, which i will never want.he talks about it now and then. and it is pretty much bugging me. i can't say yes and i can't say no-not after all the damage i have done to him. man..this is tough) and a son grown up out of his toddler years-so he makes a very good friend to me-can do things on his own and obey all what i say without opposing and highly curious and willing to learn,adores and idolises me a lot-everything i say is absorbed into his brain-so makes my job of taking care of him easier. atleast until he steps into his teen world. so basically i have nothing to complain(except the baby thing).so i don't even know why sometimes i feel down. "And she seems to have a lot, only incapable of seeing it at times.". -not sure, obsidian. not sure if i do.
Obsidian Joined: Jan 22, '10 Status: Senior User	2010-07-10 23:19:22
	Well, that was what I was aiming for, your bright point of view. I'm off to bed now, night. :P
elisafauzana Joined: Aug 27, '09 Status: Senior User	2010-07-10 23:30:55
	smart.:). thanks and good night, obsidian. don't let the vampire bite you.:)
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