Mirror, mirror on the wall....

Mel Joined: May 26, '10 Status: Senior User	2010-10-27 20:50:15
	Nothing like having Extra Sensory 'Reception'. :)))
Mel Joined: May 26, '10 Status: Senior User	2010-10-28 05:00:01
	I'm going to try and find an 'anxiety' forum. I don't know why it's taken SO long for the penny to drop. I've spent SO much time licking my own wounds that I've missed the problem all together. X suffers anxiety...no question about it. He can't help his behaviour when I'm in front of him. I've been so hurt that my own pain, has clouded my ability to see X's difficulty. Mind you...he's always protecting his ego, so of course, he can't expect me to understand. So...OFF I GO to find a solution (if possible) on female phobia. There has to be some way to help X see me as a kitten rather than a sabre tooth tiger, which is obviously what he's seeing when I rock up. He's caught between his ego and his spear. :(( Ciao cherubs :)) x
Mel Joined: May 26, '10 Status: Senior User	2010-10-28 05:01:35
	that should've read "sp(f)ear"
Mel Joined: May 26, '10 Status: Senior User	2010-10-28 19:20:40
	O.K...change of heart. I'm not going to go find an anxiety forum. At the end of the day...all I need to do is let X go. No strategy will work with him, because staying paranoid is HIS choice. There is nothing that I can do that will change his mind. He wants to believe whatever it is that he believes, and so - he'll continue to set up situations that breed anger, and more anger. That's where his mind is at. You know, I thought of yet another analogy to describe X's behaviour: there are two roses, in two different pots. Pot A with a pink rose, and pot B with a yellow rose. What X does is water pot B, thus hoping that pot A (me) will get the water. He keeps water pot B whilst pot A is slowly dying for lack of water. X thinks that pot A is getting "nourishment". Now is this isn't a sign of hesitation and fear, I don't know what is. A-men :((
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