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lunaverde123
Joined: Oct 18, '09
Status: New User |
2009-10-19 16:34:53 |
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I posted this on the Dependent PD forum as well as I received high ratings for both Histronic and Dependent PD. I'd love any of your help as I try to reckon with these issues: I am a strong, independent human being. I want to be impressive, excel in studies, work, arts, but none of it is for myself I feel. I do not want a relationship, but I want to be able to come forth to people I meet as a well-rounded and intelligent individual. It bothers me that really I am in constant pursuit of approval while I present myself as completely laid back and unaffected by such 'trivial' things as emotions and attachments. Thus people of the opposite sex enjoy my company, but when it comes to the relationship, I am generally 'the other,' and I enjoy this noncommittal position. At the same time, it gets tiring to always be hiding, sporting a facade, for the sake of pleasing others. I really do, in a maybe 'sick' way, derive immense pleasure from pleasing others, sexually and emotionally, while having little to no desire of having them please me. I do not want them to feel any obligation to me for that would immediately jeopardize this paradoxical equilibrium that exists, in which I want them to think that I want nothing from them and that I only want to give. Only attracted to those members of the opposite sex that are already in committed relationships, I tend to derive pleasure from being the forbidden fruit, the breath of fresh air. Meanwhile, when alone, I am a completely different person, needy, obsessive, which I can express to no one; it is repulsive. Worst of all, this is all quite counterproductive to my career goals and personal development. |
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semsem
Joined: Oct 23, '09
Status: New User |
2009-10-23 06:17:19 |
| well...i understand wat u r talking abt..i have friend who were in the same position i guess.she tend to be Only attracted to those members of the opposite sex that are already in committed relationships...well it's devastating..and let me say it's like self destruction impulses..like u don't want to be happy...like u choose the impossible to be ur way..and enjoying being wrong..but..actually u ll find out u ll be alone at the end..cos everybody ll go back to their actuall relationship..u ll end up alone u forbidden fruit..i am sorry to say that but it's the truth../u need reality slap..maybe if u give it try..and have date with single person..just give it shot..and see how it feel...to be in secure relationship without the fear of being alone at the end..just try it..i hope u the best | |