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shades of gray
Joined: Oct 23, '09
Status: New User |
2009-11-02 08:51:01 |
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I'm so scared at the minuite, Im ok one minuite and the next I break down and cry. I feel like I have noone like I'm the only person in the world who's caring and senstive, it's like noone gives a s--- about me or anything I do or feel. Sometimes I feel really close to people and then the next day it's like they wouldn't give a crap if I was dead. I think Ill be ok alone but then something happens and it makes me relise Im not ok alone, I need someone to trust, someone to let me know Im wanted and someone I can be vunrble around. I usto think I was strong and independent but now I relise I'm not, and I'm totalu dependent on my best friend who I go too for advise and gidence. I usto like her but now I see her as a mentor, she looks out for me, helps me. She's a year older thane ani feel safe but equil around her at the same time. There is someone I like that iv already said in another thread but I really want her to ne happy, I want to keep her safe and look after her and it really hurts that I can't. I love her so much. I'm obsesed over my weight too, I think i'm horrbly fat even when people tell me i'm not. I weigh 10 stone, I'm 15 and about 5.7 so I dunno, I hate the way I look. I'm quite butch and I look abut like a lad, but still I cry when I look in the mirror. I self harm I hate myself that much, iv made myself sick and at the minuite I cry over everything. I hear voices too, in my head I can't make sense of anything that's going on, I zone out all the time and when I get back to realty I don't know what's gone on, I'm scared |
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Unanswered Thread: What to do?! posted by Jeanine 4 hours ago |
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Synapse
Joined: Oct 24, '09
Status: Junior User |
2009-11-02 09:17:08 |
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>10 stone You're not fat. Try doing some weightlifting and builing some muscle, that'll firm up your shape. See a psychiatrist. |
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fantasy
Joined: Jul 28, '09
Status: Junior User |
2009-11-02 09:20:10 |
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Omg I'm so sorry .. I know what you mean about being fine one minute then feeling all terrible and like no one cares in the world. I don't know how to help but you should talk to your best friend about it, seems like she cares a lot for you, remember two heads are better than one, together you guys can think of what to do to make you better. The voices may be schizophrenia, you should check that out it can get really dangerous if you can't control it Please don't be scared/suicidal, the world can seem so cold and pointless at times but there are people who care about you |
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Synapse
Joined: Oct 24, '09
Status: Junior User |
2009-11-02 09:22:11 |
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but there are people who care about you Like who, you optimistic bastard? She doesn't need that kind of obvious lie right now. |
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Fatality
Joined: Jul 14, '09
Status: Senior User |
2009-11-02 09:27:00 |
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Like me perhaps, because when i was 15, which was only last year, i was pretty much like this. And almost down the the letter, except i was ~6ft then xD So please Synapse, f--- off, or at least stop making views before you know the entire picture. Not everyone is like you, some of us are empathetic. |
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Fatality
Joined: Jul 14, '09
Status: Senior User |
2009-11-02 09:27:36 |
| And except i'm a guy of course lol. | |
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Synapse
Joined: Oct 24, '09
Status: Junior User |
2009-11-02 09:36:31 |
| youre a stranger from the internet, your pity means exactly nothing | |
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stephie
Joined: Oct 15, '09
Status: Junior User |
2009-11-02 09:36:50 |
| fatality i totally agree with you and you are sooooo mature for 16. Good advice. I guess it must be hard cos if you are not happy inside how can you pretend to be happy on the outside. I'm also very dependant on others and i'm 26. Wish i could live a normal life. BUT IM SCARED!!!! hearing voices is scary i've had that too. we are quite similar. I zone out then don't remember what i have done. Kind of like i'm in my own world. If you trust your friend enough speak to him/her. good luck. it might seem hard right now. But it TAKES TIME AS WE ALL KNOW.xx | |
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Fatality
Joined: Jul 14, '09
Status: Senior User |
2009-11-02 09:43:10 |
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Synapse, you're a stranger on the internet, your arrogance isn't necessary. Stephie, thank you :) Shades of grey, like everyone else said, tell your friend. It may be scary, but it is worth it in the long run. |
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Crazy EMO Guy
Joined: Nov 2, '09
Status: New User |
2009-11-02 22:02:54 |
| it a part of life just take care of ur self when ur sad make jokes to chear ur self up talk an let it out | |
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elisafauzana
Joined: Aug 27, '09
Status: Senior User |
2009-11-02 22:28:33 |
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Synapse, F***off, u pessimistic bastard!! You are a stranger from the internet. Your stupid view means exactly nothing. |
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shades of gray
Joined: Oct 23, '09
Status: Junior User |
2009-11-03 05:38:31 |
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thanks guys, all of yoy. its just i told her earlier and were working on it. The thing is i have like 10 different sides to me and theres only one person that knows the real me. i usto be strong and latley thats just gone Ooh and synapse, they may be stramgers but what there saying means so much. but i do see your point of view on things. thats what i mean see, theres so many different ways of looking at the world< the question is, is it ok to see it from lots of different angles, are we the only thpe of people who arnt one dimentinal or are we the ones who are hypicritical? sorry cant spell. thats how i think, deeply about everything ... wierd? |
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shades of gray
Joined: Oct 23, '09
Status: Junior User |
2009-11-03 05:52:07 |
| oh and fatality, thanks you seem kinda like mee ... thats not an offense. i really need someone like me to talk too | |
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Hopeful
Joined: Aug 4, '09
Status: Junior User |
2009-11-03 20:48:13 |
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I read through it all, and got your messeges and you sound a lot like me. I'd love to talk. I am happy one minute, sad the next, and it really affects my best friend. And I want to tell her everything, but cant... Coz a lot of the time I just want to cut. Which I cant. It makes me feel like i'm caged. I just wish i could do what i wanted sometimes. But then again, part of me thrives on being trapped. I have a big story to tell you... But for now, I just want to say, that i'd love to hear more. Your relationshop with your best friend is a lot like mine with my best friend. I just want her to be happy, but she has even more problems then ME! Do you have nightmares about people leaving you too? Are you a lesbian too? |
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CrazyGuy
Joined: Oct 13, '09
Status: Junior User |
2009-11-03 20:52:38 |
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This is for whoever, if you ever want to talk ill talk to you Aim: sexymanbeast524 Email: mikal524 at yahoo dot com |
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