Please don't go...

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Thread Topic: Please don't go...

xxwolfspirit20xx Joined: Oct 15, '10 Status: New User	2010-10-15 09:27:15
	I really don't entirely know... I just... I always have to be in a relationship...e ven if I don't like the person! And even if I don't like them, I will cling ot htem like my life depends on it when they say that they have to elave (even if it is just to a class...) And it is so much worse when it's someone that I actually do like... Which is how it is with my girlfriend right now. And I am so extremely terrified that she'll leave me. That she'll break up with me and tear me to pieces. Every time she leaves, even if it's just to goto a class, as said, I always get so extremely depressed, I always want just ONE more hug, just ONE more touch, just ONE more word, ANYTHING! to get her to stay just a second longer. I am always so desperate for attention... At least from her... I always need her to be looking at me, holding my hand, talking to me, whatever... And then... I'm terrified that because of my clingyness she will leave me! I am so so scared that because of me being so clingy and such that she will leave. Which makes me wnat to just hold onto her tighter... but I know that is not hte solutions... but I feel that I can't do anything else... I don't know what to do...
xxwolfspirit20xx Joined: Oct 15, '10 Status: New User	2010-10-15 09:30:48
	Oh adn btw I am also a girl... Yeah I'm bisexual and so is she.
deblwk Joined: Sep 7, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-10-15 11:58:46
	Hi Wolf Spirit :) Been there done that especially many years ago. My mother didn't give a rats a* in a lot of ways about me and I guess I became a bit neurotic. My coping mechanisms when I was in my teens and early 20's were....since I tended to date abusive men there was usually some other guy in my friend group only to happy to rescue me...so if a break up was coming or a guy was too abusive I had someone else fast. If the guy was really nice it scared me and I usually broke up with him eventually. Other abusive men would try to "rescue" me too ironically. Anyway I really hurt some of them by dating someone else so fast...so now I don't do that. Even worse I had a kid with an alcoholic. I wouldn't trade my daughter for the world...but I don't recommend it. Another coping mechanism I had (kind of the same one) is if I sensed a breakup coming I left first. So after many hard years of getting messed up or hurting someone else now I make friends with lots of people some of them tend to seance something is up with me and turn me into an "adopted" family member. Also, any guy that wants anything to do with me has to be a least as much into me or more or I won't mess with him. On the same track they got to be chasing me way more then I am them. This translates to lots of self control. Personally, I think if you sleep with people too fast your hormones will be in the game and your head will not. Also, if I feel insecure and want to text or call a guy I realize that is the time I should not be talking to him...that's the time to call a friend or go do something even if my urges say otherwise. I won't even talk to the guy unless I feel self confident if I get stuck talking with them because we live together or something I fake it and go find something to do. It's hard in the short run but pays off in the long run. After all when they start chasing me I feel better and I don't have to worry about driving them away either. I also made a commitment to myself I won't date jerks anymore. Last guy that laid his hands on me had to face me in court. Being I had a witness, he had to deal with his actions. Don't know how much of this applies to a relationship with a girl but best of luck :)
lac8504 Joined: Oct 23, '10 Status: New User	2010-10-23 20:31:17
	I'm a lesbian too and I've always felt the same way. My fiancé just left me cause of my DPD, she want me to get help before we move on but its killing every second of the day. I can barely function @ this point...I know how you feel, my prayers are with you.
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