It's soo hard to make decisions!

Ely Joined: Feb 7, '10 Status: New User	2010-02-07 22:20:45
	I constantly get stuck making my own decisions. When I do, I tend to change my mind later and go the other way. Even with the smallest things (ex. choosing picture to send to a relative, picking a color to draw with etc. etc. ) it takes me a while to decide. Now it's mostly my parents or friends making a lot of the bigger decisions for me. I don't like it, but I don't know what else to do! I don't know how to make my own decisions because I've always been wrong in the past... anyone know what I can do?
aernum Joined: Feb 4, '10 Status: New User	2010-02-07 22:57:05
	whats the first thing on your mind that should be your decision if your a risk taker if that is... or is it that you have a bad experience wherein you committed a mistake or error from your decision that you fear on making another one... " I've always been wrong in the past" also possible that your very conscious on what people might say or tell from your decision that your thinking the best possible outcome and coz of that your taking a long time on what really is your decision.... again what is WRONG? your not ready enough to take risk and mistakes i suppose.. if you think what you do is right then IT IS RIGHT even its wrong on the point of view of other people and you must accept mistakes for youll learn alot from it (sorry for a messed up post)
Ely Joined: Feb 7, '10 Status: New User	2010-02-07 23:06:21
	It's pretty much all of the above...I don't know for sure if I'm a risk taker (can't make a resolute decision on that one...) but i will say that i made multiple bad, big decisions so i can't trust myself. And since i can't trust myself i find it hard to trust others. Yet i have to have other people make decisions for me since i can't trust myself. I'm sorry, this is really confusing and messed up. It's also partly b/c I'm afriad of what people might think if I make the wrong decisions. I try to think through every possible outcome instead of jumping in but sometimes outcomes are hard to predict. I never really came to accepting mistakes, since I'm more of a stubborn person...but when I do, I never seem to learn! it just repeats...I just don't get why making decisions are so hard >.> I usually ignore what other people think but when it comes to my friends I think about them before me. It's hard to change that!
aernum Joined: Feb 4, '10 Status: New User	2010-02-07 23:16:18
	a iron scorch on fire and pounded a hammer makes a good sword well its hard to just say here that "learn to accept mistake" for this words alone are only perceive by your eyes over the monitor "..I just don't get why making decisions are so hard" wont it be the answer is the first few sentences you made? you do fear about that i can say is enough with regrets it will just hold you back if you really want to change be more confident "I never seem to learn" oh you do learn thats why your already planning to change aside from that you DO decide clearly by posting here your problem and stating you need some advice/help etc. its already starting, you are ready for a change for your self " It's hard to change that!" hard yes it is but not impossible change takes time but it seems with your statement your already giving up rather trying it out (sorry on work cant fully post a long thread will back up later)
Ely Joined: Feb 7, '10 Status: New User	2010-02-07 23:33:44
	Ok, I see. Many of my teachers have once told me that I had leadership skills, and the ability to be successful and achieve my goals in life, but I need to have more faith and believe in myself. So she told me to get involved and started helping me re-build my self-esteem (more like forced me....-.- ) It was stressful and hard, but they told me to hold on- Building confidence takes a lot of time. I've started re-building it 8 years ago. It's still not back yet. I'm thinking about starting a club at my school for fashion. It's going to begin next week. It's probably going to attract a lot of girls that are far more popular than I am. I want to test my ability to lead people, and be more independant. Is this a bad idea? Is this too big of a jump?
aernum Joined: Feb 4, '10 Status: New User	2010-02-08 06:19:23
	a step is to move forward a leap is to move forward a greal jump would also to move forward you wont know your capacity if you didnt try to maximized your load heres a quote i made about 6 years ago "man has no limit, only you who give in it" like a rubber band you wont know its elastic limit if you didnt stretch if till it break is it right? again its about taking risk are you willing and have enough will to do it then again i think its a great idea for a change bad idea if you back down in the middle of it you must hold on and "carpe diem" you wont know if you didnt try am i right? again take risk and face challenges and be ready for all possible situation (cant really properly organize my post)
Obsidian Joined: Jan 22, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-02-08 06:24:29
	@aernum Did you say that you took drugs a couple of times a month? Because these last posts are kind of just a bunch of gibberish. :P
Ely Joined: Feb 7, '10 Status: New User	2010-02-08 16:39:36
	I guess i know what you mean....I'm going to do my best to not back out...but what if people don't approve of me? what if they think i'm not good enough to be in charge? What if they don't WANT me to lead what i created? What will i do then? I'll be forced to back down. this is a reeally big risk i guess...The way i see it, it's either going to make me better, or make it worse...:[ there's no middle ground...
aernum Joined: Feb 4, '10 Status: New User	2010-02-08 18:00:36
	@obsidian its about sept 09 i took like 60-90 paracetamols per day in a period of 2-3 days i think after a month i tried getting overdrunk with energy drinks then goes to coffee and now seems im normal "What if they don't WANT me to lead what i created" well why would they join in the first place if they dont want you? your already in the middle ground now your statement shows hesitation on what you plan to do and now asking "us" where you want continue or not...again i think this would be the first thing you have to decide on your own i mean really itsTHE FIRST THING you must decide by yourself
Ely Joined: Feb 7, '10 Status: New User	2010-02-08 18:22:32
	Ok ok, following through with it. :P It;s going to be soo embarrassing...-.-
aernum Joined: Feb 4, '10 Status: New User	2010-02-08 18:27:34
	sorry i felt the my previous post sounds mean :( dont hesitate the worst regret is not on what you have done but on something you havent
Ely Joined: Feb 7, '10 Status: New User	2010-02-08 18:35:11
	no it's fine...what you said is true. thankx. I guess what im really afraid of now is the shock ppls will have to go through. I'm known as the shy, quiet kind that keeps to herself. At school people call me 'mute'. This is really going to screw that up. :/ haha...
aernum Joined: Feb 4, '10 Status: New User	2010-02-08 20:08:30
	oh its natural to feel embarrassed its so unnatural when you dont feel any shame eh? "I'm known as the shy, quiet kind that keeps to herself." no i dont believe this statement as far your contradicting what your doing right now such as posting things and being open here on the forums am i correct? or im rather a sarcastic idiot? or so i say?
Ely Joined: Feb 7, '10 Status: New User	2010-02-08 20:23:29
	I have Histrionic Personality Disorder- very high. So yeah, I'm gonna be honest- most of this is just to get advice and attention. Lol, besides, somehow I was always expressing myself through writing. You can erase and THINK about what you're about to say. It was alway super hard for me to communicate verbally. And ok, I'm not shy, people just mistake quiet for shy. :] haha....I do keep to myself but i'm able to open up when it's w/ people i don't know. B/c hey, truth is I probably will never meet you so this discussion never 'really' took place, and won't affect anyone. At school if i tell anyone anything it spreads like wildfire and sometimes the truth is twisted and become rumors and lies. Can't trust a lot of ppls where I live. Plus I don't talk a lot b/c i usually don't think before i speak. When i do, sometimes i slip and yeah...nothing nice ever comes out unless im with my friends. I have little sympathy towards anyone else (kind of like the nicer part of me vs. the less sympathetic one.) In case you're wondering im pissed off right now, so I'm acting a little less patient and symapthetic than I usually do. Srry. Am i even making sense? Lol...
aernum Joined: Feb 4, '10 Status: New User	2010-02-08 20:38:52
	Histrionic Personality Disorder- very high no no no the test if for a preview not a diagnostic tool it is possible you do have if your pissed thats great vent your anger its better to express than to suppress about writing i suppose read a poem i wrote its on this "[no urls]" cant trust people ei? once you accept something you say means you trust what we are stating well thats from my point of view "truth is I probably will never meet you" no its not probable for meeting someone is being on a same place on a same time i saw you online would fit a better term
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