|
trayken
Joined: Jun 17, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-18 04:54:51 |
|
although ive been diagnosed with having border line personality disorder ,and two other disorders , I decided to take this test anyway and ranked high and very high on all the personality types except 1. First, I would like to say i wish the very best for all of you out there struggling with having BPD, or any other personality disorder . When I was 18 ,I was diagnosed with BPD, and i was hospitalised. The doctors that took care of me put me on several different meds, I had to attend psycho therapy, wich only got me more angry, and the DBT program. I am now 28 years old, married ,and have three amazing children . I still cannot control myself, especially my anger, but I am doing better. I try every day to live my life one day at a time. Some days, every minute counts cause it could all be taken from me. I would like to end this with; A blade of grass will only grow a days worth in one day . God bless |
|
|
Unanswered Thread: VRIELLIS PLEASE READ posted by Synapse 13 days ago |
|
|
weeza29745
Joined: May 17, '09
Status: Junior User |
2009-06-18 12:56:32 |
|
saygoodbye: Listen to trayken, and some of the other advice on here. They're right, live every day one day at a time, make every second count. I sorry about you're past, and I hope we can be here for you. Take care. |
|
|
helpafriend
Joined: Jun 10, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-18 16:35:54 |
|
If there's one thing to leave this forum with, it's the fact that you're not alone. I wish my friend could read these posts, then she would know she's not alone & hidding it or pretending everything is fine is NOT fine. She needs to realize that she has a problem, admitting there's a problem is the first step to getting better. Trayken: I love your quote about the blade of grass...how true! |
|
|
trayken
Joined: Jun 17, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-18 19:32:15 |
| hello again everyone, the quote about the blade of grass is actually not mine.A few years ago I was in a detox trying to clean myself up and was reading some quotes in a book of quotes, and I came across that quote. When I read that quote, I thought it was one of the most amazing quotes ive ever heard.A few years befor I read that quote, my therapist had told me to try and live my life,'' One day at a time.'' Ironically the quote that I wrote was by an unknown author. I meant to actually put that at the end and forgot to do so. I apologised for this, it was not in my attention to make anyone believe that I wrote it. I live by it. Trying to live my life one day at a time has actually given me almost a year and a half now without cutting myself. I still struggle with wanting to cut, but my children don't need to see that. They have seen and been through enough because of me. The child protection services removed me from my familly home for 18 months,because I was very unstable. | |
|
trayken
Joined: Jun 17, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-18 20:34:23 |
|
Sorry, it wasn't letting me type any further on that page. The child protection agency only aloud me 6 hours a week to be with my familly, and that was in a little room with a social worker. Im home again finally. I am however, using drugs and alcohol again. Almost my entire life i've been on mediction. By the age twelve I was abusing these drugs.I had found a way of being able to stop going into my mind, wich is very messed up. I can't stop thinking. Its like, I don't know. Its like there's some forbidden sence of doom, like, this dreadful aurora over me. Its there, I feel an ending and it terrifies me. So I keep using.And it gives me something different to think about. I got to go now, Its not to use right now, my mind is wondering and its taking me forever to type a sentence. take care.. |
|
|
trayken
Joined: Jun 17, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-18 20:59:35 |
|
Sorry, it wasn't letting me type any further on that page. The child protection agency only aloud me 6 hours a week to be with my familly, and that was in a little room with a social worker. Im home again finally. I am however, using drugs and alcohol again. Almost my entire life i've been on mediction. By the age twelve I was abusing these drugs.I had found a way of being able to stop going into my mind, wich is very messed up. I can't stop thinking. Its like, I don't know. Its like there's some forbidden sence of doom, like, this dreadful aurora over me. Its there, I feel an ending and it terrifies me. So I keep using.And it gives me something different to think about. I got to go now, Its not to use right now, my mind is wondering and its taking me forever to type a sentence. take care.. |
|
|
trayken
Joined: Jun 17, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-18 21:00:12 |
| hello again everyone, the quote about the blade of grass is actually not mine.A few years ago I was in a detox trying to clean myself up and was reading some quotes in a book of quotes, and I came across that quote. When I read that quote, I thought it was one of the most amazing quotes ive ever heard.A few years befor I read that quote, my therapist had told me to try and live my life,'' One day at a time.'' Ironically the quote that I wrote was by an unknown author. I meant to actually put that at the end and forgot to do so. I apologised for this, it was not in my attention to make anyone believe that I wrote it. I live by it. Trying to live my life one day at a time has actually given me almost a year and a half now without cutting myself. I still struggle with wanting to cut, but my children don't need to see that. They have seen and been through enough because of me. The child protection services removed me from my familly home for 18 months,because I was very unstable. | |
|
trayken
Joined: Jun 17, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-18 21:00:56 |
| hello again everyone, the quote about the blade of grass is actually not mine.A few years ago I was in a detox trying to clean myself up and was reading some quotes in a book of quotes, and I came across that quote. When I read that quote, I thought it was one of the most amazing quotes ive ever heard.A few years befor I read that quote, my therapist had told me to try and live my life,'' One day at a time.'' Ironically the quote that I wrote was by an unknown author. I meant to actually put that at the end and forgot to do so. I apologised for this, it was not in my attention to make anyone believe that I wrote it. I live by it. Trying to live my life one day at a time has actually given me almost a year and a half now without cutting myself. I still struggle with wanting to cut, but my children don't need to see that. They have seen and been through enough because of me. The child protection services removed me from my familly home for 18 months,because I was very unstable. | |
|
trayken
Joined: Jun 17, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-18 21:04:25 |
| hello again everyone, the quote about the blade of grass is actually not mine.A few years ago I was in a detox trying to clean myself up and was reading some quotes in a book of quotes, and I came across that quote. When I read that quote, I thought it was one of the most amazing quotes ive ever heard.A few years befor I read that quote, my therapist had told me to try and live my life,'' One day at a time.'' Ironically the quote that I wrote was by an unknown author. I meant to actually put that at the end and forgot to do so. I apologised for this, it was not in my intention to make anyone believe that I wrote it. I live by it. Trying to live my life one day at a time has actually given me almost a year and a half now without cutting myself. I still struggle with wanting to cut, but my children don't need to see that. They have seen and been through enough because of me. The child protection services removed me from my familly home for 18 months,because I was very unstable. | |
|
trayken
Joined: Jun 17, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-18 21:18:11 |
| i have no idea what i just did, or if i can get rid of those extra copies i somehow just did. I don't usually use computers. This is why. Ive got to go now, you all take care out there. | |
|
DyingToBeNormal
Joined: Jun 10, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-18 22:21:50 |
| Hi everyone, I believe I have BPD.... I've done alot of research on it and it seems to fit me perfect.... I have also been reading about a plant called Tabernanthe Iboga... Supposedly the root bark can be eaten and it produces hallucinations... Scientists are studying it's properties and how Ibogaine( the chemical in the root bark) makes those on it have a "rebirthing" process... The trip, the best I can describe from what I've learned is that you are forced to encounter your subconscious... Fir example... If you were abused as a child it forces you to revisit that pain and deal with it.... Afterwards people describe a feeling of cleanliness... I was wondering if anyone had any information on this drug, it's uses, and how it could help tthise who've been abused to move past their past.... | |
|
amythesx
Joined: Jun 20, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-20 07:38:45 |
| I took the personality test and came up very high on borderline....My biological mother has been diagnosed with BPD as well as her twin sister. My dad suffers from a chemical imbalance causing depression, his mother suffers from depression...I got it from both sides of my family and I am terrified I may have BPD. I stopped seeing my psychiatrist years ago...I think it was out of fear...I am trying desperately to present normal to the world. I have a responsibility you know I have to be a good mom..I can't be the screw up that my mom was so that my kids get taken away from me...I have a husband so that helps, but we are on such rocky terms...I don't know how much longer that piece of stability will be here...there is a part of me that just wants to run again...like I have done my entire life but I won't because I love my kids...gods I feel like a screw up...I am afraid to attempt to get help because that ultimately could be used against me if I get a divorce...but then again so could my past (I was in mental hospitals and on medication, he knows this but "I am all better now". Really I thought I could grow out of all of this... | |
|
trayken
Joined: Jun 17, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-20 12:59:09 |
|
to amythesx : first, you are not a screwup. you are just different. i to am diierent. trying to get help is good, at least you are aware that you have a problem. i know what you meen about having children and being afraid of seeking help and it going against you. thats what i did, i was very unstable and when i seeked help, well, it really backfired in my face. as i previously mentioned a short while ago, i had everything taken from me. my wife,my children ,home and everything. for eightteen months i had to bounce around living with friends and familly members. no matter how i was doing, they wouldn't listen. 5 months after i was removed from my familly, there was this one night that my wife and i wanted to go to church. since my children were not aloud around me, and visey versa, my wife and i found a baby sitter to look after our children. i, and my wife new the individual really well, considering he was my unkle through marrage, and he had to kids of his own. well it turned out we did not no him at all. |
|
|
trayken
Joined: Jun 17, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-20 13:37:46 |
|
sorry, as i was saying, he molested our daughter. im gonna cut to the chase. he, for what he did, was not allowed around his children for only three months. Three months!!! i may have a few personalities that have made me unstable, but never in my life have i done anything like this. i guess what i want to say to you is becarefull with what you say to ( professional ) doctors. certain sickness are worse than others in the eyes of these doctors. when children are really at risk, they are not being protected, but when you have a loving parent, like yourself, who realises that they have a problem, you sometimes get looked at as if you are the worst person in the world. but you, and only you know that this is not true. i have to go for now. i would really like to talk some more with you about this later. to you and everyone out there,hang on. hang in there. God bless. |
|
|
tpsens
Joined: Jun 21, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-21 21:39:21 |
| i wouldn't worry too much about this horsecr@p test. people tend to get the results they either want or expect. thats why therapy involves at least two people, and yes, i have a degree in this area. the harm that one could inflict with unguided testing is a greater concern than any "result" you might get here. in short- don't worry about it. go see a community therapist if cost is a concern. you are prob. not as screwed up as you think or wish you were. | |
|
Unanswered Thread: OCD Bracelet Fund Raiser posted by vbaz 34 days ago |
|