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nicole222
Joined: May 22, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-03 23:13:21 |
| shat, that isnt my email address its ndware222 at gmail dot com | |
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Unanswered Thread: What to do?! posted by Jeanine 4 hours ago |
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nicole222
Joined: May 22, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-03 23:34:14 |
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(Someone else wrote this im replying)but doesn't seeing a professional just prove your as unworthy of a person as you think you are in the first place? If I am this unhealthy mentally, then maybe I don't deserve the help. I don't want to lose the ability to function with meds and I don't want to lose the person I am. I just want to feel like I don't need to hurt myself in any way... You have bad habbits have probably been brow beaten, and when something happens your synapses go crazy taking you from one bad past thought to another that has no correlation? yeah? NO YOU DESERVE HELP AND SEEKING because you need it does not mean you are not worthy nor am I going to let you think so. you know how to use the internet. that is more than alot of jackholes do know. You just need to lose the person you are. Yeah I said it you do. Change is the hardest thing. harder than even wolverines skeletal structure man. You arent going to "Lose yourself" because obviously you have already insinuated that you have. You just need some unconditional love,someone who pushes your limits to become as great as you daydream to be, and also your "need to hurt yourself" is really your need for someone to help you learn to stop hurting. and the functioning on meds part. What do meds do? well antidepressants block certain chemical combos from repeating. you dont even know what chemicals it is blocking. how about some good old fashion push ups? that way your personality wont be chemically reclused. it will flourish |
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saraisthenewlow
Joined: Jun 5, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-05 10:08:06 |
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I'm borderline. I actually just got out of the hospital for about two months from it. It sucks big time, but DBT (dialetic behavioural therapy) helped BIGGG time. Check it out. :3 |
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weeza29745
Joined: May 17, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-05 12:57:05 |
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nicole222: I am a female, and it's unfortunate that counseling hasn't helped you... Maybe it's the inconsistency... BUT. Those with BPD do have unconditional love, it's just difficult to show that we do and it seems like we're all kinds of crazy for it. Wish I could help more... I know that having someone who can promise to never leave you, break your heart, etc, etc, helps, a lot. But you have to be able to swear it on your soul... If you can't, it may backfire and hurt you and cause you to hurt yourself even more. I don't know the answers, just what I've concluded from my experiences. Wish you all the best of luck. Take care. |
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Confusedgirl
Joined: Jun 6, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-06 02:20:16 |
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Hi I'm on here looking for some support from fellow people who are or have struggled with mental health. I have suffered personality issues for as long as I remember. My mum says I was always different to my twin sister as a child, clingy, withdrawn, hated being alone. Events in my life have highlighted this & I went on to have volatile & destructive relationships, dark spells of depression, eating disorders, drug & alcohol issues, & self destructive behaviour such as proMiscuity & manic spending. I have had years of pychiatric assessment & was told I have personality disorder. I did the online test & scored v high in just about every category. I decided to move to the other side of the world 3 months ago & leave my family & friends behind. Now I'm lonely, depressed, having problems at work, sleeping around,engaging in negative relationships,& to others I'm perceived as being erratic & attention seeking. I thought I had made progress, but since being here I've felt confused & have exAggerated feelings of failure, impulsiveness & desperation. If anyone can relate& share advice I'd really appreciate it. Thanks. |
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Confusedgirl
Joined: Jun 6, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-06 03:03:42 |
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Lizzy & others who suffered sexual abuse, I can relate to the long term affect it has on your mental & physical wellbeing. I was sexually assaulted by a so called friend about 18 months ago. I had been on a massive drink & drug bender at a party & woke up to find him in bed with me, doing inappropriate things to me whilst I'd been sleeping. I was devastated, confused & felt betrayed & worthless. I went on a 4 week binge & ended up close to suicide & am lucky not to have OD'd with the amount of drugs I was taking. I also became very promiscuous, my thinking was that as people thought they had the right to abuse me, I may as well let them. One night I was so out of it, I was hallucinating & delirious... I convinced myself I was going to die & wrote letters to my family & instructions for my funeral. After that night I realized I was on a one way path to total destruction & sought help for my mental instability & drink & drug problems. I knew there was no other way & my sister told me she & my mum were seriously considering sectioning me, as they knew i would end up dead. This was the turning point for me & I was lucky to get a great counsellor who helped me address underlying issues in my childhood & made me see it wasn't my fault, that I didn't ask for or deserve this illness or the things that had happened to me. Please seek help, running from your issues is no long term solution, I should know, I have lived with serious mental illness for half my life & took too long to get help. I still suffer, but I have vowed I will not give up on myself & realized my road to recovery will be a very long one. The younger you are when you get support the better, these feelings do not go away, they manifest themselves & only worsen in severity. Good luck to you, you sound a very brave young lady xx |
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telula
Joined: Jun 6, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-06 16:08:47 |
| Unfortunately I have done the cutting but much worse. I have cut through my wrist that bad I was referred onto the plastic sugery guys to stitch me up, apparently I nearly hit my radial artery. I have also taken 3 major overdoses which have landed me in hospital for several days at a time on an infusion. I am regualarly picked up by police in regards to me being 'safe' or unsafe as the case may be. I have also been admitted to a psych ward. But on top of all of this I also suffer from PTSD (POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER) after a horrific attack which is going to trial at the end of this year. So good days, eh? But like the guy above, at least I can still be humourous about it. Oh yeah, the shrinks now think I may also be bi-polar! Do they have nothing better to do with thier time than handing out diagnosis? | |
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telula
Joined: Jun 6, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-06 16:12:01 |
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Hey confused girl, Where did you move to? I completely get your first thread. I have moved too in vain over the years, but I have to be honest, it doesn't help, a new life an all...The underlining problem still rears it's dark and destructive head.x |
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cherrynlilbit
Joined: Jun 6, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-06 18:39:28 |
| I was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder when I was 14 and about 5 other psychiatrists have given me the diagnosis since. I'm the typical borderline, I show every symptom of it there is, but now, i'm afraid because it's getting worse. My mind has turned to chaos. i'm paranoid that the government and secret societies are putting sumliminal messages in music, movies and tv. I'm terrified because now, I hear whispers calling my name. Does anyone know what could be wrong with me? any suggestions? I don't have health insurance, so I'm using a forum to get help, lol. | |
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xxfayxx
Joined: Jun 7, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-07 15:21:55 |
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Ive thought I have BPD for a coupple of years now,,my uncle has it and he thinks the sme as me but when i went to the doctors and told them i cut myself and had made a detailed plan of my suicide in the past all they done was give me some help lines!!! Ive finally managed to stop the cutting now i think the same way as suzi t. i get out the sissors then think what am idoing his for. yuhave just got to think before you do things its kinda a mentl barrier. when i was at school i had the same thing if i decided that i didnt wantto go to school nothing would mame go in till i stoped looked at things and realisd its less effort to just go thatn sit hear arguing about it. i was also very depressed fora year or so but im better now. I got very high in boarderline, Histrionic and narssitic,,, i dont know what to do though because if i go backk to the doctors they will proberbally just give me some more support groups to ring :s |
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weeza29745
Joined: May 17, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-07 17:04:27 |
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Like xxfayxx and suzi t said, THINK. Think about how this will effect the people you love. I stopped cutting because I told my boyfriend, and I SAW how it effected him. He was so sad... He told me he couldn't bear knowing I came to school with cuts all over my arms. It made something click for me. It helped me abandon that habit, of course, I always feel like doing it, but I think about his words and how much he cares about me and my mental health, and I stop. So think before you're destructive... Seriously. Take care, best of luck. |
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juliemillward
Joined: Jun 8, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-08 05:00:43 |
| just joined ,and going to share this with you good people.My daughter who is now 16,i think has a personality disorder,quite which one i dont know.Having resd up,it is evident that some kind of disfuntion accurs during childhood to be "labled"as having a personality disoder.my daughter has overdosed,cut arms,blew up cars with petrol,beat up people,broke into houses,stole,took every drug immaginable,including heroine.by 13 she was put into secure unit,on realease was tagged.by 16 she was pregnant and for a while things calmed down,then she had another child,she now feels trapped with her partner and after many affairs has left her partner and children and moved in with an equalilly unstable bloke.as ever its always someone elses fault,never taking the blame only manipulating so well ,that the people who love her feel that it is there fault!she has bouts of depression and has often talked about suiside.doctors have gave her antidepressants that havent helped.hher new goal in life is maybe having a child with this new fella,or if it dont work she feels justified in her thinking that her ex partner will drop everything and have her back.i have never felt my daughter has ever felt remorse for her actions,and often acts how others would exspect her to acts and hey if everything goes wrong for her its everyones elses fault and she has that option of taking her own life.what do you do ? | |
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ticklemybeard
Joined: Jun 9, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-09 07:19:38 |
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Wow a lot of heavy, heavy stuff in here and I feel for you all. How about a positive story? I was diagnosed with BPD 6 years ago; failed suicide attempt, then 3months of hospitalisation following a relationship break up. Things were bad, but they did improve. I think the key is looking for help and never turning back. I have no doubt that for every single one of you there will be times where you feel like that no-one gets it. And they won't! But as long as you have that resolve to keep looking for something better, you will find it. I am now a successful architect and lead a very happy, fulfilling life despite having to deal with BPD and depression every single day. Just remember it won't go away. But suicide is not an option - everybody is loved by somebody, and to knowingly inflict indescribable pain on them isn't O.K. You could keep on keeping on, but that would suck. So make the decision to get help, try various methods (meds+ongoing psychotherapy works for me) and for as long as you keep trying things will continue to get better. Cheesy I know, now let the retorts fly! |
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lizzie
Joined: Jun 9, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-09 08:57:59 |
| I have sufferd from bpd for 4 years it is a very hard thing to deal with I have very bad realtionship problems with it I use to cut myseof but in the end it does nothing but leave scars now I get angry all the time and it is basically ruining my realtionship I am currently 8 mounths pregnant and I am getting heapz of help of the hostipal and all that for it help is out there or you can talk to me I still suffer from this but I am allways here to listen and give advice thanks cya | |
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weeza29745
Joined: May 17, '09
Status: New User |
2009-06-09 21:10:55 |
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juliemillward: Bless your heart... You poor parent. It must be so hard to have your daughter be going through that. Have you tried talking to her about it? ticklemybeard: It's good you found help and you have a healthy, successful life... I'm happy for you. Take care, y'all. |
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