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fantasy
Joined: Jul 28, '09
Status: Junior User |
2009-09-09 13:05:06 |
| I know, Hopeful is like a dream friend ... Hopeful your friend is really lucky to have you. | |
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Unanswered Thread: What to do?! posted by Jeanine 1 hour ago |
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Hopeful
Joined: Aug 4, '09
Status: New User |
2009-09-10 03:47:19 |
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Hahaha, yeah.. I hope so.. I just wish I wasnt stuffing everything up. I have never been stopping with my mistakes... I dont always feel like a good friend, at all.. :( |
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hopscotch
Joined: Sep 8, '09
Status: New User |
2009-09-13 00:58:06 |
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but you are you just keep on looking at things you have done wrong instead of everything you have done right. im sure if you list all the nice things you have done or tried then it will be much more than the wrong. |
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LadyStardust
Joined: Aug 20, '09
Status: Junior User |
2009-09-13 15:45:11 |
| that is sweet of you to make her a book :) you are a good friend | |
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Hopeful
Joined: Aug 4, '09
Status: Junior User |
2009-09-20 20:12:56 |
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Thankyou guys... You're really nice. I am so scared for her, thats all... :( |
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Hopeful
Joined: Aug 4, '09
Status: Junior User |
2009-10-10 17:59:29 |
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She says I dont care about her... I dont know how else to prove it to her... I'm really upset :( |
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Alaycat
Joined: Oct 5, '09
Status: New User |
2009-10-16 13:35:10 |
| Have you ever tried some tough love, like maybe taking her to your school counsellor and maybe trying to get her to see that she needs help, and maybe write her a letter saying what she means to you and how her actions are affecting you and herself. Just let your heart out, be hoenst but don't tell her she;s stupid, Be honest but watch your wording. But getting her to see a counsellor wheather she has BPD or not could help her. If that doesn;t work considering im a assuming shes a minor talk to her parents about what she's been doing and your concerns and maybe they will get her the help she needs to feel great about herself and to stop cutting. She might hate you for this all at first but after she gets help and starts healing she will be thanking you.BTW I wish I had a friend like you. | |
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Hopeful
Joined: Aug 4, '09
Status: Junior User |
2009-10-17 19:09:34 |
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She will never see a counceller, I know she wont... And if she did, it wouldnt help... She doesnt let people help her, she just doesnt... And when they do, she'll get angry and say shes fine... She sometimes completely shuts me out... and 'im fine' is all she'll answer.. But i just want to help.. :( |
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Alaycat
Joined: Oct 5, '09
Status: New User |
2009-10-18 16:51:42 |
| Play hard ball | |
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Mindful
Joined: Oct 30, '09
Status: New User |
2009-10-30 09:30:32 |
| Did you tell het yet? | |
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stephie
Joined: Oct 15, '09
Status: Junior User |
2009-10-30 10:39:26 |
| hopeful you sound lovely and a fab friend to have. It must be very hard for you as it is for your friend. It's so sad that she doesn't recognise that she has these problems. Thats the most hardest part. It seems people with BPD always take out their anger on the ones they love most. Don't give up. Maybe you can make her see sense in the end. You've been with your friend through thick and thin by the sounds of things. There wil be a light at the end i hope for you both. Good luck.xx | |
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shades of gray
Joined: Oct 23, '09
Status: New User |
2009-11-02 14:44:58 |
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Wow you kinda just discribed me :s scary the thing you have to remember is she won't let you do it because she loves you as a friend ... I think ??? And it's pretty obv you have feelings for her so everything she dose will hurt you more than if it was someone eles. Just ne there fit her as it may be all you can do atm. Sit her down when it's only you too and you can't be interupted and tell her it's worrying you, scaring you and althoe you'll never get mad and your always there you need her to stop, and she can talk to you when she gets angry or wants to hurt herself and "talk her down" just when your talking to her let her know that your not trying to turn it round on you and you relise it's worse for her, (only cus if you don't she might take it wrong way) I'm super senstive too :/ trust me it's a good thing to be, you make great friends and stronger relationships, I know it's hard at first cus it can be too easy to hurt eachother but in the long run it's nice to have many sides, I do. I'm different round everyone and only one person knows the real me, and it's her that hurts me time and time again without even relising it. Sorry I got side tracked ... Hope iv helped a little :) xxx |
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Hopeful
Joined: Aug 4, '09
Status: Junior User |
2009-11-03 20:35:02 |
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shades of gray; thankyou for your advice. It was really helpful. She says i hurt her more then anyone else, and i hate that i do that. She knows she upsets me with her depression and cutting, but... it makes her feel even worse towards herself. I've already said that i know shes off worse then me... I really do try to be there for me. She occasionally opens up, but its impossible for either of us to see a solution. Things with her completely contradict eachother, so nothing works. But she needs me, she loves me... although she does hate me a lot too. She wants me to tell her everything, but now ive been hiding things, I've found. Since i broke her promise, and cut again... wow... yeah, i did that. I made things worse. I stuffed it up. She almost left me. Yeah, I'm a horrible person. I get that. It was so wrong. I did it coz i was hiding my sadness coz it made her feel worse. And I needed expression. So i cut, and planned on never telling her. I felt so much better, and thought i could just do it whenever i felt (which is about everyday) and then i wouldnt need to put any of my sadness onto her. It seemed perfectly logical, but no.. did not work, of course. I got more depressed because of it, coz the guilt killed me. I cried and cried at school from the guilt and had to make up reasons. I had cut three times within a week before i cracked, and told her. Shes cut more ever since. I made her worse. I did... Yet still, she does not want me to blame myself or feel guilty.... I know i really have a horrible person, so your good oppinions of me you can throw out the window. But... I just need help.... i really need help... Hearing about her cut makes me want to... And she says shes probably going to leave schools next year. She thinks she makes my life worse, and no one else cares about her. I know they do care though, her other friends just arent the right sort of people, and arent good at showing it. They cant talk to her about the cutting. They cant talk to her about depression. Only i can, coz i know what it feels like and i understand. They avoid it. They ignore it. So she thinks they dont care. SIgh, im going on too much... I'm just freaking out... There has to be hope, there HAS to be.. |
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shades of gray
Joined: Oct 23, '09
Status: Junior User |
2009-11-05 12:29:13 |
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Hey, me again. I talk too much. Kinda sad that it's only been like a day? Since you responded and I'm worried, barin in mind I don't know you. :/ I know what it's like, the closer you are to some one, the more you know about them, the Easyer it is to accsedently hurt them, and the harder it is to accsept it's not always your fault. It was the dame for me. I think you need someone eles, someone you can trust and tell things to without the feeling of putting strain on them, and when they have there own problems it becomes alot harder :/ but then you have the problem of them feeling you don't trust them hmmm it's realy hard, but with the right words you'll get your point across I'm no good with words .... Oh btw your not s horrble person, I wish someone cared about me the way you care about your friend, I mean the things you seem to think make her worse don't seem anything compared to the way you help her it's not what you do, it's why you do it that makes someone relise your special. Corney I know. And try and tell her the resons you cut, why you did it, how you think you put strain on her. And shell most likley say don't be stupid! Your probls don't make mine any worse, I want to be there , you know you can trust me, tell me everything. Then if she dose tell her you see past the mask, you know she's hiding how she realy feels and you think it's you, but you know she has alot of other stuff on. See how that goes, it's what I did. I write songs about my friend. I showed her one once but didn't tell her who it was about. I'd imagend the reaction I wanted and when I didn't get it I cried. Lifes full of games, I'm on the ghost train at the minuite, can't wait to get off. :) Sorry one of my many one liners. Lifes a wild ride, that's the only resin I'm screamin. And another. Again hope iv helped :) btw are you from England? Wana talk off the forum? Like I said if you want a wing man/ lesbian haha I'm hear :) xxx |
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Unanswered Thread: VRIELLIS PLEASE READ posted by Synapse 14 days ago |
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