the way you cut yourself

emo cutie Joined: Mar 7, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-03-14 19:19:42
	lost: everyone has their own flaws. but everyone has their own perfections. your perfection is that you can share your feelings with others, when i cannot. my flaw(s) are that i dont have good looks. and my perfection is that...is that... umm, cannot think of my perfections. heres my life quote lost: its easier to believe the negative than it is to believe the positive.
LoveLost Joined: Mar 2, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-03-14 19:20:11
	because there is nothing that i like about myself. my looks my personality, im a wuss i hate that im depressed, i hate that i get panic attacks i hate everything
Obsidian Joined: Jan 22, '10 Status: Senior User	2010-03-14 19:20:12
	I think that life is optional. If I didn't feel anything but suffering and no light in the end of the tunnel, I wouldn't hesitate to kill myself. I'm not trying to encourage you though Lost, you are probably just in a teenage phase caused by some letdowns and hormones. If you were serious you wouldn't post anything about it here in order to get people to talk you out of it.
emo cutie Joined: Mar 7, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-03-14 19:22:27
	lost: your perfection: you can share how you feel. your flaw: you dont have that gr8 of a self-esteem. but, as i said, its easier to believe the negative....
LoveLost Joined: Mar 2, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-03-14 19:24:41
	on;y reason i post it on here is because my friend is out of service and my counselor is not open.im not f---ing posting it here for sympathy
Obsidian Joined: Jan 22, '10 Status: Senior User	2010-03-14 19:28:28
	What did you want from your friend and counselor then?
skullwithhair Joined: Dec 5, '09 Status: New User	2010-03-14 19:28:44
	i have gotten a weird response from my friends who cut when asking this question so i am hoping someone here can help me. as most of you know if you cut the same spot over and over it sort of loses its effect. well i have been cutting for a long long time and i have been looking for new places. i have been cutting the skin on the side of my penis for about 2 months now. it was great at first but the scar tissues has built up and it just doesn't feel like it used to. last night i was drinking in my room and i experimented cutting my eye. it felt incredible, words cannot describe it. my entire eyeball was covered in blood and it looked like i had a red eye. just standing in the mirror and watching the red tears run down my face made me feel better than i have felt in a couple years. my problem is that it won't stop bleeding. it has been bleeding slowly since yesterday, and it wont stop. i have to goto school tomorrow so i was wondering what i should do. if i can't figure it out by tomorrow i am going to have to run away for a couple days because if my stepdad finds out about this he will kill me.
LoveLost Joined: Mar 2, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-03-14 19:33:20
	what i normally do is i call my friend who is also suicidal a dn we talk and he calms me down so my urges arent wont make me do anything impulsive. i dont call them to seek attention, i call them because if i know i don't they'll find me dead with a roe around my neck
Obsidian Joined: Jan 22, '10 Status: Senior User	2010-03-14 19:37:39
	>LoveLost I never said that you sought attention or sympathy, you did. I said that you wanted people to talk you out of it. And when you couldn't get that from the counselor or your friend you came here.
emo cutie Joined: Mar 7, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-03-14 19:38:57
	skull: uhh... you cut your eye. interesting. ummm. i would tell my dad if i was in the situation that you are in that i have to go work on a project for school and have to be there really early. but if he finds out about your eye then say something like you got a paper cut on your eye while doing homework.....
LoveLost Joined: Mar 2, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-03-14 19:41:59
	im just sick of of feeling like im doing nothing. ive got everything ready to do it i just wanna give the world just one more chance to prove me that i can make an actual difference
Obsidian Joined: Jan 22, '10 Status: Senior User	2010-03-14 19:43:43
	I don't see your logic, how will killing yourself change anything then?
LoveLost Joined: Mar 2, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-03-14 19:45:40
	beacuse id rather be dead, completely gone, no worries no troubles just infinite blackness than going through life with all its bull s--- where you work for something never to be recognized, like all my efforts for change arent worth s---
emo cutie Joined: Mar 7, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-03-14 19:46:32
	lost: so, your basically just gonna choke yourself.....i always feel like the world steps on me and then 4gets me (kinda like roadkill).. im not complaining, but my life is sadder than the devil and i also have the urge u have but i know that if i commit suicide, i wouldnt only hurt me but i would hurt everyone i know. and theres another reason why u shouldnt commit suicide, but i dont wanna say y.....
Obsidian Joined: Jan 22, '10 Status: Senior User	2010-03-14 19:54:51
	LoveLost, if you think that your work will be recognized without you having to work hard and put a lot of effort into it. Maybe you should kill yourself. People whom work hard and passionately for reaching their goals are the ones to reach them. And with your attitude, you will never be able to.
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