How to STOP Cutting Yourself

disorderguy Joined: May 5, '09 Status: Admin	2009-07-17 08:36:09
	Cutting oneself is a common type of self-harm among those with borderline personality disorder (BPD). We have quite a big thread about cutting yourself on the forum, where people have shared their experiences. But identifying the problem is only the first step. How do you stop cutting yourself? How do you overcome the urge? Is it through willpower, or through treatment, or a support system? Must the primary cause, BPD, be treated in order to be able to stop cutting? I hope that people--former cutters or those who are still dealing with it--will share their advice on how to stop cutting.
Fatality Joined: Jul 14, '09 Status: New User	2009-07-17 09:28:07
	I drift in and out of phases where i do cut and where i don't cut. But when i have (temporarily i admit) it's mostly willpower, and support from friends that stop me. I realise this support may have not been intentional, as i had pretty much alienated my best friend, when i talked to her about it, this gave me the willpower to stop that time.
Saki Joined: Jul 29, '09 Status: New User	2009-08-01 02:20:34
	As cheesy as it sounds, the only reason I have stopped cutting is because of my girlfriend. She is my life, and when the topic of my self-injury came up, she started to cry so....=\ Everytime I feel like cutting I either think about how she, along with all the other friend's I have the tend to check me, would react...that or I think about how if I leave scars on so and so place, then I can't do that really amazing cosplay because then everyone can see them...=S
marisavat Joined: Aug 4, '09 Status: New User	2009-08-04 08:11:35
	im happy to know im not the only one out there that struggles with this.i also go through periods where i cut, and then periods when i dont. my main motivation for not doing it, though it doesnt always work, is that it upsets my husband, and also, i dont like to have to lie to my kids about why i have so many "boo-boos"
aca6 Joined: Dec 19, '09 Status: Senior User	2010-07-19 19:53:19
	If we have so many "cutters" here it's a wonder that this thread isn't popular. Here's to one post after 349 days. ^_^
noodles Joined: Jul 14, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-07-19 20:50:47
	First off, you have to WANT to stop cutting. If you're mind is still set on cutting, ehhhh tough luck. And when you do decide to stop, STOP cold turkey. Don't put it off until the next day or so. In the meantime, fill in the vacancies with something else, like maybe a hobby or talking to a friend (this is really helpful). If you feel the need to start cutting, pick up the phone and call whoever or go do whatever. :P
inspiredbyJ Joined: Jul 15, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-07-20 03:40:43
	this thread is a good idea, i saw the other thread and it made me angry. no one was trying to stop. the way i usually hurt myself was with my nails- i would scratch the skin from my fore arms, when the skin was gone i'd continue digging. i stopped in grade seven when people started noticing and i saw how much it hurt them, that they could see what i was doing and they were afraid. that was a few years ago and i still have patches of scars to remind me. i was addicted. the urge to hurt myself would wake me up in the night, i would give in to it because no one was there, i was all alone. i still suffer from the sleep deprivation- sometimes i only get to sleep at 6am, only to wake up an hour later. but i beat it. it couldn't take me, i won. whilst i was hurting myself life, by most peoples standards was great, i had no reason to be sad. but i was. Then my best friend (she never called me her best friend, but she was the closest friend i'd ever made, the only one i trusted, even more than my family)she betrayed me. she stole from me and turned everyone she could against me. the cutting got worse, far worse. i hated her, i'd never hated anything before, but at that time, it dominated me, my mind , my actions were 24/7 driven by my hate for her. it hurt me and burned me from the inside. for a few months it stayed like that. then my leader, after i conversation with her, i noticed that she was sad. for a moment i looked at myself they way she saw me. hateful, ungrateful, blind, bitter. i decided i didn't want to be that person, i didn't want to hurt my leader like my friend had hurt me. so the next time i saw my best friend, i talked to her, told her i was sorry for the things i'd done (i know i'd done some) and decided never to trust her, or have anything to do with her again. i forgave her. but i would move on. after that i turned towards God to help me forgive her (forgiving isn't easy). but with God's help i became stronger, compassionate, someone i could love, and THE CUTTING STOPPED.
Kori kitten Joined: Aug 9, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-08-18 21:21:52
	When I stoped it was honestly because my mom made me she found out and yelled at me for hours then she made me go to therapy and wouldnt let me near sharp objects I have started again but I am trying to stop and I think I can all thanks to my best friend who I trusted enough to tell he has done nothing but suport me and encurage me to stop:)
aimlesslylost Joined: Jul 21, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-08-19 21:22:30
	the first time i stopped, it was because my friend threatened to tell my school counselors that i was cutting, but it was more than that. he told me how much he truly cared about me and how hurting myself hurt him. so i stopped for a year.
dysfunctional22 Joined: Aug 19, '10 Status: New User	2010-08-20 11:13:14
	I agree with Inspired by J. The other thread was alarming, yes we have a problem but telling eachother ways to cut ourselves wont help. It sounded more boastful then coping with our behaviour. We need to understand that we have something that normal people cannot fathom and moreover clearly it isn't healthy. Should'nt we then try to help eachother get out of it, find a way to be happy?
california Joined: Aug 2, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-08-20 11:18:31
	Inspired: what if your convinced the only reason God put you on this earth was so he could point and laugh?
ShudaCudaMitaBen Joined: Apr 27, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-08-20 12:17:57
	"what if your convinced the only reason God put you on this earth was so he could point and laugh?" Then you are severely deluded and overly estimating your importance in the overall scheme of things. Blaming your problems on God is just another way to keep from taking responsibility for your own actions.
california Joined: Aug 2, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-08-20 12:48:09
	Shuda: my actions have nothing to do with my situation. My whole life has revolved around other people actions. And I don't blame god, however, I do question his intentions.
ShudaCudaMitaBen Joined: Apr 27, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-08-20 13:16:13
	Sure they do, whether it be action to do things differently or inaction to take steps to change. If you question His intentions read your Bible. I recommend Job, if you want to talk about suffering and having things hard.
dysfunctional22 Joined: Aug 19, '10 Status: New User	2010-08-20 14:22:22
	California: At a point I too believed that I was put on this earth for God's amusement but wouldnt that make my life suck more if I was led to believe I have no control over my life and other forces kept getting in my plans? I'd rather blame my failures on myself because atleast I had power over my decisions, right or wrong. Then only can I come to terms with it and mend my ways so to speak. ShudaCudaMitaBen: I like your approach. Whether its Bible or Torah or Vaydas or Koran, "God helps those who help themselves"
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