Do You Know Who You Are? Part II

kjs Joined: Dec 2, '09 Status: Junior User	2010-01-17 18:22:41
	Erinro, I am a little half way through the book...it is good...i think I might have to read it twice though to really get it..I like his take on things. especially his thought on when we are angry and the way we hold our hands...clenching, fisting...then to open them..relaxed and placed upon our hearts...the anger melts away....it does..:) try it! And yes we are friends!:)DOn't give up...please please please don't give up!
Scoutabout Joined: Jan 14, '10 Status: New User	2010-01-17 18:37:12
	I came back expecting to see more hostile posts and was surprised. Erinro, you don't need to apologize for anything. The only thing I would caution is that not everything someone says to someone else would neccessarily be projection. Haart: I went back and read my postings. I can see where I came on rather strong and how it could be taken as probing. From my end, I know I never meant any harm, but from your end, how would you know? I do have trouble with social skills and drawing lines at times - re my comments in a posting above wherein I say that it gets a little fuzzy for me at times as to where boundaries begin and end. It can be nothing for me to leap in and talk very frankly with people, people I don't even know, not even realizing that I might be making them uncomfortable. However, I hope in the future that people will not react with hostility or name-calling if I cross any boundaries you're uncomfortable with -just call me on it, in a nice way.
erinro Joined: Nov 13, '09 Status: Senior User	2010-01-17 19:17:36
	Thank you dear, you too. I'm so glad you're enjoying the book. =) He certainly is a wise guy.. That's an interesting thing about the hands, I'll have to pay attention to that... glad to see that you came back, scoutabout. interesting that you have difficulty with boundary-crossing, i have this trouble too. i do not know how to interact with people and protect myself at the same time. i have a whole theory about it, but anyway....
blackbirdxx Joined: Dec 23, '09 Status: Junior User	2010-01-18 01:10:32
	The problem with questions is they can make u think about things u dont want to think about. The question is not the problem. Its how it triggers us. eg I had a lousy xmas and a screwed new years. Rather forget about it but when asked how was ur xmas it brings it back. I just say "quiet" but those who had a good time want to tell u all about it. But questions do make u think.
lucky13 Joined: Jan 6, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-01-18 09:43:02
	Blackbird's right, the questions do make you think more...but to be honest I think too much anyway, so to me it doesn't really make a difference. I actually appreciate your interest scoutabout but I dont understand why you care. I dont even care about myself, I struggle to care for others as much as I do want to...
lights_rage Joined: Jan 18, '10 Status: New User	2010-01-18 23:56:39
	I try to fake independence act tougher than i am more independent. would give yall my msn but that prob would prove a bad deal, somethin about bots. i am on twitter and myspace both are under the name lights_rage feel free to follow/add me. i dont mind. i put the msn and stuff up there if you so desire. I like helping i really do. i just am out of options for myself. so i turn and dedicate myself to helping others.
Scoutabout Joined: Jan 14, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-01-20 17:37:00
	lucky13 - I care because I don't like to see people hurting at all. I care because I'm Christian. (Relax - I won't "preach" to anyone unless they ask me specifically to do so). I care because I choose to care, for what is the alternative? NOT to care? That's not who I want to be. Not caring is why we have the problems in the world that we do. What would we do if someone didn't care? What about the people in Haiti, for example - what if no one cared? How many more would have died under the rubble? How many children would we turn a blind eye to? Nope - I WANT to be a caring person, and I believe it is a life choice that anyone can make.
erinro Joined: Nov 13, '09 Status: Senior User	2010-01-20 17:51:42
	>I care because I'm Christian. (Relax - I won't "preach" to anyone unless they ask me specifically to do so). *L* Ok. >What about the people in Haiti, for example - what if no one cared? I gave $10 to a Haiti thing today in the subway but I only had a $20 and I didn't want to give that much so I asked the guy to give me change. He looked at me funny. It was either that or give a 5! I don't have much money! So I guess I care $10 worth but not 20.
aca6 Joined: Dec 19, '09 Status: Junior User	2010-01-20 18:10:03
	Erinro: You care or else why would you have given anything in the first place? Just because you couldn't give 20 doesn't mean you don't care. People expect more of others than they do themsleves.(I really hope what I am saying makes sense) Everybody is human in some way no matter even if they think they are not. Remember it's the thought that counts. (cheesy but true in most cases)
Scoutabout Joined: Jan 14, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-01-21 15:52:08
	erinro - Not to get "preachy", but this is a true story: There was an organist in church who played the organ up in the balcony while the congregation sat down below. From up high, the organist was able to see when the donation plate was passed around. A poor woman, who wore the same shabby coat to services every Sunday, would place a dollar in the plate every time. The plate would be passed from person to person, and when it came time for a very well-dressed wealthy socialite to put her donation in the plate, she would put in a quarter, every time. It's not so much the money that matters, but what's in someone's heart.
JRjames Joined: Jan 21, '10 Status: New User	2010-01-21 16:58:39
	Wow that was really touching scout, very inspiring. I can almost relate to that, except I'm an atheist and my solution would be to con the socialite and defraud her of her money. Enriro.. don't give money to those people, they're con artists and I know. Half of those organizations take their own cut and the people who really need it.. don't get it, sorry that's life.
Scoutabout Joined: Jan 14, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-01-21 18:24:05
	JR - I almost laughed at what you posted above, but then I realized that you probably mean what you're saying! You seem to see the world in black and white - mostly in black would be my guess. I prefer to see the world in a lighter shade of gray. You are right, of course, that there are cons in the world. That's just being real. But it is also being just as real to say that there are good people in the world. I don't believe that the people risking their lives in Haiti, pulling people from under the rubble, are cons. I don't believe that the people delivering food and water to those in need are cons. I don't believe that doctors providing medical care are cons. Are there cons in Haiti? Of course. But one can give in and let these cons win. Let evil people triumph over good people. Is that what we want to do? Erinro - keep giving. It's a good thing to do. Just be careful who you give to, then give what you can. Heck, JR might even join us. He just might find out how good it feels to help those in need.
Hip Joined: Aug 10, '09 Status: Senior User	2010-01-21 18:35:48
	No s---, he is saying the a--holes who run the donation programs take a large chunk of the sum of money submitted into their own personal pockets. Donation programs are a f---ing joke. If I wanna help someone out, i'll help or lend them cash personally.
JRjames Joined: Jan 21, '10 Status: New User	2010-01-21 19:54:44
	good point scout, did you happen to get wind of the 4,000 escaped haitian criminals that got loose in the quake and armed themselves with machetes? they're not cons theyre killers.
erinro Joined: Nov 13, '09 Status: Senior User	2010-01-22 10:47:42
	corruption is complicated. i agree that the "people delivering food and water" or the doctors helping out aren't cons. and i agree that a lot of the supplies once delivered don't get where they're supposed to go. that's what corruption is, and it's worse in a country with a not even minimally stable government. i run a tiny charity in Africa and it is heartbreaking; we just want to send a few children to school and the f---ing town council is getting all up in our business and everyone is asking the person who does the work on the African side for employment, to the point where I feel like we are being pressured to pay protection money in order to be able to operate. it makes me want to throw up my hands. but then the children won't get anything at all. the west gives millions of dollars in aid every year but how much of it gets where it's going, due to corruption? does that mean that you give up on the people in need? in my opinion, the west has to wake up from its pollyannaish attitude in which our needs for feeling good are satisfied when we throw money blindly at "the problem", and, not stop giving money but ask tough questions about where and who it's going to. and monitor things properly. because you can't expect the people on top in countries where there are no non-corrupt options for making money to forego corruption. it's tragic, frankly..
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