Thread Topic: loner, confused,
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invisible
Joined: Sep 21, '09
Status: New User |
2009-09-21 00:41:28 |
| im a 16 year old girl. and i scored very high on avoidant. all my life since i was young i have been shy.i am a weird girl with extremely short hair(almost boyish)and wear a whole lot of black(no i am not emo, though i did experiment with that and im not going back there again)i have been called loner,freak,dork,weird,and creepy.(yes people do come up to me and say i creep them out) i moved away from my childhood home about 3 years ago. i left a very close friend behind. i kept in contact with her for a year even after i moved. but soon after i stoped calling her. and ever since i have moved its been really hard for me to make a real close friend. even online social websites scare me. i had a hi5 and a myspace for a couple a month and just erased them because it still didnt get me any true friends.and i was also afraid of talking to the people. anyways i dont even have close relationships with my own family. they all know me as the quiet one. and ive even built a hatred towards my grandmother and now growing towards other people(long story). every day when i get home i talk to no one or even at school. its even worse at school. about a week ago my teacher was taking pictures of everyone and calling everyone up by last name. but typically he missed or forgot about me. i had to tell him he missed me.(i was the only one forgoten) its not uncommon for me, when ever i speak i am ignored(i talk in a very low voice). i remember once i was talking to a friend(who i no longer talk to much anymore) and a boy looked at me and said "you know no one is listening to you right?" i said "i know". i am not able to make and keep friends easily. but when ever i do try to say something i am always ignored(or maybe just not heard) but its extremely confusing because i am in love with a boy. he loves me back but i dont want to become dependent of him if i lose him ill feel alone and thats what keeps me from geting any closer to him. anyways hes exactly the opposite of me. he is very popular,loud and social,friendly and funny it sort of bugs me. like just yesterday we were walking together and he went up to a table of friends and i just froze and stood there as far away from that table as possible. when ever he gos up to his friend i always stay behind and just wait for him to come back to me. i am not a person to want to be dependent and reliant and ask favors of people and he takes his popularity to that advantage. yes he is my boyfriend and i completely forget all my troubles and have no problem(sorta) talking and being comfortable with him.BUT THAT COMPLETELY GOS AGAINST MY NATURE!!anyway his popularity is a problem to me because it attracts attention to me. people come up to me and say "hey arent you his girlfrind?" and honeslty it bugs me(they dont even call me by my name they call me that guys girlfriend) and i feel like i have to keep this surtain image of being the "popular guys girlfriend" so i am very confused. i have moments when i sit and say what the heck is wrong with me? | |
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Unanswered Thread: Yay to Me posted by Notcrazy1010 14 minutes ago |
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CCW
Joined: Sep 21, '09
Status: New User |
2009-09-21 10:45:56 |
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Hello, invisible(since you show no names, that is the only thing I can call you). you partially remind me of myself at some points, but because I have never tried to do something about my current state I can not promise that I will be able to help in any way. you should attempt to find a way to live with your popular boyfriend and his friends. If you are planning on staying with him, he will most likely try to bring you into his group of friends for a better overview(popular people tend to have many friends, and the more you have of an item, the more time you have to spend caring for it. to care for something is much easier if it is located at one spot rather than running around). a way of tolerating people you don't really want to be with, is meeting with people that do not have the social problems or whatever makes you avoid your boyfriends friends. sadly, the only group of people I can think of that you can be certain would not bother walking up to you and saying "you scare me", is emos: most of them are self-centric or so pushed down in society that they wouldn't try to bully anyone. |
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mishelle76
Joined: Sep 22, '09
Status: New User |
2009-09-24 11:13:04 |
| Hi there. I used to be extremely shy and scared of people. I would walk backwards to avoid eye contact or have my head down so as to only see where I was walking. There is hope. I pushed myself over and over to get into social situations to eventually feel comfortable enough. I say "enough" because I'm still shy and I still prefer not to be amongst a group of others but I realized it was holding me back from life. My family (aunts, uncles, cousins) always tried to bring me out of my shell but ultimately I got sick of being in it. You will be okay and you can overcome this. I have faith in you =) | |
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FallenAngel1
Joined: Sep 24, '09
Status: New User |
2009-09-24 21:26:18 |
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If any1 wants to talk then i would love to have a friend to talk to. I have several disorders, which i would love to talk about and will listen to others troubles, and could probably relate to them. x This is how i scored; Disorder | Rating Paranoid: High Schizoid: Moderate Schizotypal: High Antisocial: Low Borderline: Very High Histrionic: High Narcissistic: Low Avoidant: Very High Dependent: Very High Obsessive-Compulsive: High |
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Unanswered Thread: My results posted by Sexynatalie291 54 minutes ago |
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