I'm reluctant to self diagnose

jake20589 Joined: Aug 16, '10 Status: New User	2010-08-16 15:23:02
	First off, I've been diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder and General Anxiety Disorder. I was never fully confident in either diagnosis, especially bipolar. My social anxiety has gotten much worse over the past few months, which leads me to believe i have AvPD. Here's and example of how my brain works: Hanging out with a good friend of mine, I closely monitor every aspect of his speech, his body language, and his level of interest in the conversation. After he says something, I try to formulate some sort of reply that i over analyze. >Does it sound stupid? Will he find the reply interesting? Would it even make sense to him? Then i pick apart the wording, eliminating any slang, poor (sometimes proper) grammar, and anything else that he might not fully understand. At that point 5 minutes have already passed, and i find my self looking away from him, in silence. On a good day I'll mumble an "oh really" or "yeah..". And when i do talk, I'm 90% sure it's at too low a level of volume. Sorry for the wall of text. I'm not sure if i should go back to a psychologist or what.
Hip Joined: Aug 10, '09 Status: Senior User	2010-08-16 15:24:18
	Sounds like AVPD to me.
jake20589 Joined: Aug 16, '10 Status: New User	2010-08-16 15:39:03
	What do? Zoloft didn't really work out for me.
Hip Joined: Aug 10, '09 Status: Senior User	2010-08-16 16:48:32
	Resist the impulse to need to get something perfect before you consider it fruitful. Take pride in fucking up every now and then.
Shapes Joined: Jan 10, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-08-16 19:07:28
	Same exactly here OP, I was diagnosed with minor Asperger's, but I think it was bulls---. Honestly it's just anxiety. What, if any, drugs are/were you prescribed? Paxil is a drug that really helps for this, but you could also try Xanax. Ask your psychiatrist about both of them and see what he he thinks. Sorry for just throwing out drug names at you, but personally I couldn't mentally get over this barrier alone, without some help.
jake20589 Joined: Aug 16, '10 Status: New User	2010-08-16 21:05:27
	I was on Zoloft, and it didn't do much good as previously stated. I don't think I gave it a fair chance however. At half my recommended dose I was hallucinating in the dark, so I was scared off of it. I'm reluctant to go on other meds. Hell, I'm reluctant to tell my parents I have a problem. I'll see what the therapist says. Maybe I do need meds.
Hip Joined: Aug 10, '09 Status: Senior User	2010-08-16 21:14:25
	Given that you already got enough problems to deal with, I dont think hallucinating and hearing voices is gonna help you become more functional. You say you recognize your symptoms, so start rehabilitating yourself. Sit up straight, look people in the eyes, speak louder and more clearly. Resist the urge to overanalyze.
Derrick Joined: Mar 26, '10 Status: Senior User	2010-08-16 22:13:17
	^^ What He Said ^^ The ball is in your court.
jake20589 Joined: Aug 16, '10 Status: New User	2010-08-17 20:21:38
	It's to the point where the flow of speech is intimidating. I pause and occasionally stutter. Meds are necessary at this point i think. No more putting it off.
adam29 Joined: Jun 26, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-08-17 21:00:41
	The thing with SSRI's is that they are hit and miss. And sometimes it kind be a long and arduous period finding a good medicine for you. It took me a long time and a taking bunch of different drugs to find one that actually helped. Some people don't find one that does or ultimately leaves them in a foggy state. So if you want to avoid that route, it's understandable. You seem to have a lot of anxiety, and a drug might help if you feel it has really gotten too bad. Xanax works with fighting anxiety. It actually works too well and is a controlled substance and can be abused for recreational purposes. So I'd be careful about using xanax. All that aside what derrick and Hip said is completely true, "You say you recognize your symptoms, so start rehabilitating yourself. Sit up straight, look people in the eyes, speak louder and more clearly. Resist the urge to overanalyze." and "The ball is in your court." The medicine isn't going to do a whole lot of good if you don't address those issues in that way. If you need help with attacking your issues, You can go see a therapist. Medicine is never going to heal you without the therapy that goes with it. Medicne can simply alleviate some of the symptoms for a little while but they aren't going to fix your problems.
Hip Joined: Aug 10, '09 Status: Senior User	2010-08-17 21:26:10
	Psyche meds treat one disease and create a hundred more, nuff said.
adam29 Joined: Jun 26, '10 Status: Junior User	2010-08-17 21:59:48
	point taken, I do agree, at least for the SSRIs benzodiazepines are a different animal though. I can personally attest that they work incredibly well. The only problems that come with them is from taking too many of them at once. Other than that, not many side affects. And I'd only recommend them as a temporary solution to alleviate some of the symptoms if it is as bad as he says it is. It would make things easier to address some of the important things you mentioned hip. I'm just saying meds are contributing tools that can help but therapy is his best tool.
jake20589 Joined: Aug 16, '10 Status: New User	2010-08-18 06:41:57
	Thanks guys. Aside from the risks and dependency of benzodiazepines, they seem like the best option. I'm making lifestyle changes as well, I know pills don't do everything.
simian60 Joined: Aug 19, '10 Status: New User	2010-08-19 14:54:17
	It's all fine and dandy to tell people to just pop some pills and otherwise just try to "resist the urge" to act and think the way you do. You need to look into the irrational beliefs that are at the heart of your problems. Your tendency to monitor yourself and overanalyze every little thing you do or say stems from self-esteem issues. Try to find some good info on self-acceptance.
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