Thread Topic: Welcome to the Avoidant/Social Anxiety Forum
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sahra
Joined: Jul 14, '09
Status: New User |
2009-07-14 23:19:40 |
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Hello I just completed the personality test and the answers i received made some sense. However knowing more, confuses things as now i have multiple personalities. Im not going just by the test alone as over the years ive seen numerous doctors,counselors and psychologists and yet here i still am confused as ever. In the past ive been diagnosed with having several phobias and tried many antideppressants . Ive thought about suicide many times but never actually attempted it but something worse occurred my son committed suicide last year. I cant stop believing all my anxieties , phobias etc lead to my sons own believes in life is not worth all this. Day to day is a struggle though i realize others are worse off than myself and i should be grateful that i am alive, wish all was that simple. |
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Unanswered Thread: Cyclothymia posted by Darkman33 6 minutes ago |
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mcas
Joined: Jul 18, '09
Status: New User |
2009-07-18 19:49:43 |
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srroc wrote: 2009-07-01 01:11:27 Hello all. My reason for writing this statement is to offer an alternative point of view and possibly a solution to the Social Anxiety condition. "Thoughts created in the mind are rarely original, meaning that they are based on routines, mental systems and conditioning. ...Consciousness in its rawest state is the heart so the heart is YOU, so to speak. It's the part that is completely undefinable. ... People radiate an ethereal energy. This energy ranges from a harsh materialistic and egotistical energy right up to less harsh and more compassionate energy that is less visual. "The more materialistic a person is, the more they need to invade other people's five sensory system in order to be noticed." My mother is like this. She is always emailing me even though she has said she feels like she has information overload, she's always taking it in and passing it on to me. I find myself working out while on the phone to her to combat my annoyance. "The less materialistic a person is, the less they will do to be noticed. So, the ethereal energy radiated by people ranges from harsh to mellow." My dad is like this. It's funny--they are almost polar opposites. My dad hates "real jobs" even though he is a really nice guy, and smart, he doesn't seem smart to strangers. Someone I dated in middle school told me my dad "sounded stupid" on the phone. Grr. But anyway, my dad has told me that his meditation practice helps him focus on his heart, and listening to it, or what you describe as a psychic ability (I would call it empathic). He ventured off when I was in elementary into Transcendental Meditation (aka TM) which he told me later focuses more on the mind... but he felt like he'd lost something in going that way, like it was just a "mind trip," he told me, and went back to his original meditation, which is taught by an Indian American named Prem Rawat, which he learned when he was 22. He is in his 50s now and I, his daughter, am 24 and gained the techniques of this meditation a couple of years ago. There is a long process into gaining the techniques, which is totally free--contributions are voluntary--don't worry you're not hypnotized or any stupid concept like that. They have started to post videos of him delivering inspirational messages which used to be called Satsang when he was new to the US and still using Hindi descriptions. The messages seem "self evident" and are supposed to be--they serve to redirect each person towards his or her own spiritual center or heart. He calls the techniques and their practice a journey toward Self-Knowledge, distinguished from informational knowledge by the capital K. I have been practicing it more recently and the more I practice it regularly (he asks you to make an hour a day if possible for those committed to receive it), it helps me feel more emotionally flexible, less caught off guard and less concentrated on negative emotions (something that neurologist Daniel Amen says people with deep lymbic system disturbances such as those common in depression tend to do--he calls them Automatic Negative Thoughts--I have also heard them called bad self-talk). Knowledge seems to help me get out of my deep limbic system and painful sadness and into more peaceful feelings (in the outer cortex as Amen has found from his study of the brain from heat scans of it, "Change your brain, change your life." More about Prem Rawat and his message can be found online (try googling) including podcasts of his messages. I hope some of you are helped by this. Daniel Amen's book can be found on Amazon. Regarding medication Personally, I have been on medication for depression and with my psychiatrist have experimented with ones that control the main brain chemicals, seratonin, norepinepherine and dopamine. I tend to find that medications concerning norepinepherine work best for me. My boyfriend says they do "take the edge off" though he didn't notice emotional issues in me before I was taking them. He tends to get depressed about work and impending bills, etc., but is secure on a personal level, while I tend to want to self-injure, but not really have the ability to go through with it. My bad habits include yelling at myself for various incompetence to the point where I can want to die. But I have found that Wellbutrin, which regulates norepinepherine and dopamine, gets me the closest to my metaphysical heart as srroc describes it without actually practicing Self-Knowledge. It is available in generic. Cymbalta, a newer drug, regulates seratonin and norepinepherine, and like srroc noted, I feel it puts me back more in my brain-mind-ego, to the point where I get really random and funny but sometimes can be violent if something torques me off... though I imagine the norepinepherine helps with this, as it is nowhere near as dangerous (I feel) as the clinical trials of Prozac where you heard news stories about people on this seratonin-effecting drug becoming violent to themselves or others. I was on prozac for about a week in high school and felt like i was in love but there was no one i was in love with, particularly... Anyway, I hope I've provided an approach for everyone. For those of you using drugs for treatment, check out Wikipedia and the medical versions of it for more info... And Dr. Amen's book, about the physical manifestations in the brain of different kinds of depression. It's all a journey toward knowledge of either the physical or the metaphysical mind. May you grow to love yours someday. |
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insecure
Joined: Jul 24, '09
Status: New User |
2009-07-24 03:41:14 |
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I'm a 17 year old attending HIgh School. I find it very difficult to talk to anyone apart from my small group of friends. When someone talks to me who i don't really know I blush and almost every girl that talks to me I blush as well. I feel like an idiot and I wish I was at home in my room. I spend most of my free time on the computer to escape my real life. I really want to be able to talk to people and girls. I want a girlfriend. But I can never see that happening. I'm scared of leaving high school because I will either have to go to university or get a job. Either one I choose I am scared i'll be looked towards as some kind of freak. I feel as though my life is already over and i'm only 17. I think this started around 12 years old when I left primary school. Can someone please help me or give me tips because i dont want to talk to anyone about it not even my parents because they may be disappointed in me. |
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disorderguy
Joined: May 5, '09
Status: Admin |
2009-07-24 08:01:40 |
| insecure, you sound just like me when I was your age. If I could go back in time to tell me 17 year old self what to do, this is what I'd say: get help for it. Forget trying to deal with it on your own or hoping it will somehow change in the years to come. It won't, and you'll miss out on a lot. Get help. It's hard--maybe one of the scariest things you'll have to do in your life. But if therapy, or drugs, or whatever works... your life will be dramatically improved. You don't want to be here ten years later wishing you had done something sooner. | |
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Shadow
Joined: Jul 30, '09
Status: New User |
2009-07-30 01:28:24 |
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Uh, Hello Well, I am 17 years old and like some others on here I rarely ever speak or participate in anything that requires a group effort due to being afraid of embarrasing myself or making myself look stupid or saying something stupid or looking stupid,etc. Relationships never turned out well for me either as everyone sees me as cold, indifferent, or stuck up(Which I'm not) and it is frustrating. Anyway this is a terrible experience and I feel for everyone who lives with this. Got any Ideas? |
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Shadow
Joined: Jul 30, '09
Status: New User |
2009-07-30 01:31:44 |
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Uh, Hello Well, I am 17 years old and like some others on here I rarely ever speak or participate in anything that requires a group effort due to being afraid of embarrasing myself or making myself look stupid or saying something stupid or looking stupid,etc. Relationships never turned out well for me either as everyone sees me as cold, indifferent, or stuck up(Which I'm not) and it is frustrating. Anyway this is a terrible experience and I feel for everyone who lives with this. Got any Ideas? |
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Perfectionist
Joined: May 29, '09
Status: New User |
2009-08-01 21:39:57 |
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Srroc's post on page 1 made so much sense to me. My mother and other people have said that I'm either psychic or "a sensitive" because of my behavior as early as age two. Srroc's post also explains why at age two I would have panic attacks in public places. At that age I had no idea why this was happening so at age 5 school was pretty much overwhelming and I was put on some liquid medication so I could even get on the school bus. I did get through school and college but it was really difficult. I was off and on different medications and diagnosed with irritable bowel syndrome on top of it all. After college I worked to the best of my ability but I had a lot of sick days so I had to bounce from job to job or be fired. I didn't know why I couldn't handle it and my doctor's weren't much help. After losing my job and wrecking my car in an accident (not my fault) I had to move back in with my mother which made me feel like a complete failure. I was like 32 year's old and couldn't take care of myself. I gave therapy another shot and all those horrible meds another try. The medications made me sick and I dropped down to 96 pounds (at 5'6") and then the doctors said I had an eating disorder....*sigh* The therapy did help- it helped me to look at things in a different perceptive so I highly recommend it! I stopped seeing those doctors and started trying an alternative healing method. I went completely homeopathic for my digestive issues and it's helpful. As far as the anxiety/"heart mind" that srroc spoke of I've made friends with people over the years that are either psychic or a sensitive and we talk about it. I've had dreams that come true but I've never really been surprised about it. There are too many stories to tell but I belief she is correct. I stopped medications and use kundalini yoda and reiki for the long lasting healing that medications doesn't bring. It's not for everyone but for a long term sufferer..it's the best meds I've found. I hope this helps! |
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BoringBoris
Joined: Aug 7, '09
Status: New User |
2009-08-07 16:15:39 |
| hello everyone! just checking in I'm new. | |
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Me21
Joined: Aug 9, '09
Status: New User |
2009-08-09 23:02:48 |
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My life is consumed by a fantasy world that doesn't exist. Well, only in my head it does. It is my own little perfect world that I tune into hour by hour, minute by minute. It used to be specifically when I listen to music, now it is everything I do. I thought I was the only one in this world and now I don't feel so alone nor mentally crazy. I love my husband and my baby, but this perfect world is so intense to crave to have. I ofen feel guilty and try to justify my guilt into my fantasy world. The soonest someone is available to see me is over a month away. Even though I just had a baby and symptoms are worse, I am not taken serious enough. Even when I was pregnant and also in my teenage years, it was blamed on hormones only that would "clear up" soon. None offered support, guidance or anything. I have always been on my own in this little world of mine since I was a toddler. I can sky dive and give public speeches to thousands, but I can't handle BBQ's too well. I crave alcohol and avoided it during pregnancy and breast feeding due to my baby. Now that I gave up breast feeding that has caused alot of stress and a let down from that expectation I had of myself, I am drinking Jack D right now just to take the edge off of hurting. To get the same "good feeling" I would feel in my fantasies. I thought of suicide many of times through out my life, but never tried to carry it out. Now, main reason is because my daughter needs me. Not fair for her to have a mommy gone just as I had a daddy gone (he is alive, but not part of my life). I don't dare mention it as people only think it is a form of attention. Constantly I am observing that often people think I am unfriendly, stuck up or not social when I am at a function. Being observant allows me to know who is fake and who isn't. It allows me to ease drop to conversations to know who is a two facer and who isn't. If one will talk about sommeone behind their back but be nice to them in person, that allows me to know they talk about someone to me, they will talk about me to someone else. So I avoid those people, to which is many! |
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Caticia
Joined: Aug 31, '09
Status: New User |
2009-08-31 15:23:18 |
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Okay so I was a little hesitant while reading srroc's post because it's sounds a little pseudo, but I also feel like I can sometimes sense other people's emotions. I mean, literally in another post I called my dad an angry, scary shadow because that's what he felt like to me. All I really want to know is if srroc has some evidence of his(or her) 8 years of research? It would be nice to have some citations and other pages I could visit to find out more. Maybe he or she could recommend a reading list or something? |
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Laveria
Joined: Sep 8, '09
Status: New User |
2009-09-08 06:20:25 |
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That was a really good post srroc. It makes sense to me because Im a very emotional person, the moment I meet someone I feel assaulted by so many emotions I break down and end up crying over the other person's hello. Its very embarrassing to have to run away crying over a simple hello and because of that Im afraid to meet anyones gaze because they might want to say hi to me. Though there are a lot of other reasons for my avoidance, but Im more interested in asking what kind of method or how to start on converting these emotions from others instead of taking a pill for it. |
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kez
Joined: Sep 9, '09
Status: New User |
2009-09-09 14:35:15 |
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Hiya, I've got this avoidance thing as high, defo have social anxiety (actual diagnosis by psych team). T The guts of my problem is - i have good self esteem about what i think of myself, but over the last 10 years have come to expect people to dislike me after i talk to them. That in itself doesn't bother me, but I've got this thing where I'm scared to talk to old friends, anyone before 8 years ago, THAT Is what I would really like to change. It's related to refusing to get out the car in certain parts of town (that's about 20%) mostly associated with my past. They (old friends) are the people I care about and I guess I can't handle them disliking me like almost everyone else does. (seriously, they do. I just got banned from another 2 places, one on the internet and one social sports club most of the members just glare at me in real life because the sport we play - well I don't like the cliquey over competitive way they play it, and they have chosen to misinterpret my complex feelings on the subject. Deep down I'm totally a people person and still manage to keep about - 2 community work relationships going well with a couple of managers. I just want to either - to become likable to my old friends, or not care what they think anymore. But am really interested in any other feedback. |
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dazedandconfused
Joined: Sep 21, '09
Status: New User |
2009-09-21 19:25:26 |
| srroc, that was some of the BEST insight I have ever heard. IT REALLY MAKES SENSE TO ME AS WELL. | |
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Unanswered Thread: my test posted by Mark777 6 hours ago |
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